


the third season we deserved

by cryptibug



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Bisexual Dipper Pines, Bisexual Fiddleford, Bisexual Stan Pines, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Ford is Gay, M/M, Mabcifica, Pacifica is a lesbian, Pansexual Mabel Pines, Past Fiddauthor, fiddauthor - Freeform, fidds and ford are besties, ford and mabel become closer, mabifica, oblivious sapphics, present fiddauthor too bc i need my gay old men, the entire pines family aint straight, there will be some angst, wendy is bi and has a gf, wendy is the elder wlw
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-11-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:33:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 25,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26474971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cryptibug/pseuds/cryptibug
Summary: takes place the summer of 2013, aka the summer following the events of the show. stan & ford are taking a break from their adventuring to stay back at the shack for the summer with dipper and mabel, who have just arrived.soos, melody and wendy all work at the shack. stan helps make attractions sometimes but doesn’t work there. soos and his grandmother moved out of the shack for the summer so the pines’ can be there.mabcifica will be a part of this but isn’t the main focus. as of right now i don’t think there will be much of a plot, but each chapter will be connected more or less. over time relationships will develop as well as the characters.this is my first time writing fanfic???? fjxjdjxj gravity falls is my favorite show and i love writing so i figured i’d give it a go. i hope i can write the characters well and do alex hirsch justice.
Relationships: Daryl Blubs/Edwin Durland, Fiddleford H. McGucket/Ford Pines, Jesus "Soos" Alzamirano Ramirez/Melody, Pacifica Northwest/Mabel Pines
Comments: 12
Kudos: 58





	1. reunitement & the pool

**Author's Note:**

> hey everyone!! i’d like to take up this note just to elaborate on my plans for this fic.  
> i’m sure you got a decent idea from reading the tags and the summary. i’m incredibly attached to gravity falls and its characters and with this fic i hope to expand on some things i wanted to see on the show. among these things include mabel and ford’s relationship, mabel and pacifica becoming friends & getting close, ford and mcgucket working together again, and more.  
> i can’t say i know how frequently i’ll upload on this. for now i’ll aim to upload once a week. i’m caught up with school and finding motivation to write is often a struggle so i may be inconsistent.  
> i literally just started this account so it’s not like i expect this fic to blow up overnight, but i hope it reaches some people and they enjoy it.

Mabel yawned unnecessarily loudly and rubbed the sleep out of her eyes as she sat up. She and her brother crashed hard the night before after their late arrival to Gravity Falls.

“G’morning, Mabel.” Dipper said without looking at her, focused on unpacking his luggage into the annoyingly small dresser.

“Hey, wait a minute, don’t take up all the space in there! Where am I gonna put all my sweaters?”

Since last summer, Dipper had actually expanded his wardrobe past the same vest, t-shirt and shorts combo, so his clothes occupied more storage than anticipated. “How about you use that chest at the foot of your bed? There might even be a cute mouse family living in there.” Dipper suggested sarcastically.

Mabel squealed in excitement and hopped off her bed, but then frowned. “...Waaaait, you’re just being mean, aren’t you?”

Dipper snorted as he neatly folded the last of his shirts to put into the drawer. “That was the intention.”

Mabel sat back down on the edge of her bed and kicked her feet. She stroked Waddles, who still slept soundly atop a rumpled blanket at the bed’s end. “Why are you in such a rush to unpack, anyway? We literally just got here and—“ She tilted her nose up and sniffed. “—if my super sense of smell doesn’t deceive me... there are pancakes waiting for us downstairs!”

“Because Grunkle Ford said last night that if I got all my unpacking done in the morning then we could play DD and more D before the others come by later. He even said he’s been planning a campaign for me!” Dipper grinned as he continued to load the dresser, now focusing on his pairs of shorts and other bottoms. “Also, since when do you have a super sense of smell?”

“Uh, since now, duh!” Waddles snorted and sat up. “Good morning, Waddles!” Mabel squished his cheeks. “Come on, you little rascal, it’s pancake time!” She picked up the pig and carried him to the door, despite his complete capability of walking over there on his own. “Are you coming or not, Dip?”

Dipper waved her off. “You go on, I’m almost done. I’ll just be a few minutes.”

“You got it, bro-bro!” Mabel left the attic and gently set Waddles down, then started down the stairs to see her grunkle at the bottom step, sporting the apron she’d made for him with the phrase _‘Ford The Lord’_ embroidered on it in earthy tones.

“Great timing, Mabel! Stanley is finishing up the pancakes, and I was about to wake you and your brother up. Is he still asleep?”

“They’re _Stancakes_ , Sixer!” The other grunkle shouted from the kitchen.

”He’s awake, he said he’ll be down in a minute. I am _loving_ that apron on you, by the way. I knew forest green would be your color!” Mabel flashed her signature brace-filled smile at Ford as she followed him downstairs and to the kitchen. “Is Stan wearing his?”

“You betcha!” Stan puffed out his chest, turning to face his niece and his twin as they entered the kitchen. His apron read _‘Stan The Man’_ with a color scheme of golds and reds.

Mabel gasped and pressed her palms to her cheeks. “Oh. My. Gosh. My adorable grunkles wearing the aprons I made them? At the same time? Without me even asking them to? Now this is a scrapbook-ortunity!” In lightning speed, Mabel pulled a disposable camera out of the waistband of her pajama shorts and snapped a picture of her stunned grunkles before they could protest.

“Do you always keep a camera in your waistband?” Stan asked after wincing from the flash, turning back to flip the pancake currently on the griddle.

“I _never_ miss a scrapbook-ortunity.” She said in a serious tone as she slipped the camera back into her waistband.

Ford cleared his throat. “Ahem, those plates on the table are for you and Dipper.”

Mabel sat down at the side of the table closest to the window, where, beside a glass of orange juice, her plate awaited her. She could instantly tell that Ford fixed it. The two pancakes were stacked neatly with the words _‘welcome back’_ written on top in syrup with surprisingly good penmanship only Ford could pull off. “Ford, this is so fancy!”

Ford smiled fondly. “Only the best for you and your brother. And feel free to add butter or more syrup if you’d like. I just wanted to make sure you saw that message first.”

“Yeah, you severely underestimated the amount of syrup I use, but that’s okay!” Mabel then grabbed the syrup bottle from the table, opened it and flipped it upside-down over her pancakes.

”Hey, IQ, come serve yourself, your Stancakes are done.” Stan called to his brother as he plopped two pancakes onto a folded paper towel next to his griddle.

“You do realize you’re the only one calling them that, right?” Ford sneered as he loaded his plate.

“You know, I totally could’ve kept those for myself and left you to make your own. Then the ones you had to make would be Fordcakes, which has absolutely no charm or ring to it at all.”

“Stanley, both our names start with Stan.”

The two continued to bicker until Dipper entered and caught their attention by exclaiming “Wow, syrup calligraphy!”

”Dipper, my boy! Are you ready for our upcoming game of Dungeons, Dungeons and More Dungeons?” Ford asked his nephew as he carried his plate to the table and took the seat across from him.

“Am I!? I already finished packing, can we start after breakfast?”

Ford chuckled and smiled fondly. “Of course.”

The duo then rambled on about the game; Mabel attempted to follow along, but sighed in relief when Stan finally sat down at the table with his own plate.

“Stanley, what makes these any different from regular pancakes?” Ford asked before taking the first bite of his serving.

Stan gasped overdramatically and clutched his chest, over his heart. “Fordsie, how dare you ask such an offensive question? This is insulting to me and my legacy! Stancakes are a novelty!”

”Here’s the answer to your question, Grunkle Ford,” Dipper said as he plucked a grey hair from his pancake, making a repulsed face at it as he held it between his fingertips, then dropping onto Mabel’s plate.

Mabel’s eyes lit up. “Normally, I’d be grossed out and attacking Dipper with syrup right now, but a _radical_ idea just popped into my head! Ford, could you make a Stan clone with this hair?” She held the thin piece of hair and dangled it from her grip, squinting at it and grinning maniacally.

“Mabel, we’ve literally dealt with clones before, remember? Or, I have—you were lucky you weren’t involved in that.” Dipper shuddered at the memory of his own copies of himself attacking him.

”Sorry, Mabel, that old copier that we disposed of would’ve been your chance. And I think starting a new cloning project would be... counterproductive,” Ford leaned toward his brother so he could reach him and elbowed him playfully. “Frankly, I think having another Stanley would be enough to send me over the edge.”

Stan rolled his eyes, but his mouth upturned to a smile. “Well, Mabel, I think that’s a great idea, which Poindexter over here didn’t give me the chance to say before shutting you down. But seriously, just let that lock of my gorgeous hair—“ He sniffed and wiped a fake tear from his eye. “—fall to the floor.”

“Hmph. You guys are no fun. I see no problem with extra grunkles,” Mabel grumbled, but extended her arm away from the table and released the hair from her grip. “So long, wasted opportunity.” She said glumly as she watched it float to the floor.

Following breakfast, Dipper and Ford set up and began their game in the living room. Meanwhile, Mabel tagged along with Stan for his grocery trip.

After assisting Stan in unloading the groceries and putting them away in the kitchen, Mabel brushed her hands together than placed them on her hips. “Hmm, what now?”

_HONK!_

Mabel gasped and ran through the living room (impressively leaping around Dipper, Ford, and their scattered sheets of graph paper) to the back door, and continued her bolt outside.

“Hey, hambone!” Soos called as he stepped out of his pickup truck, waving to her. Wendy, Candy, Grenda, and Pacifica followed suit.

Mabel exchanged tight, enlivened hugs with everyone, then stopped at Pacifica. “Not gonna lie, I can’t say I’m upset, but I definitely wasn’t expecting this.” Mabel said to her with a hand at her chin.

The blonde cleared her throat. Her hair fell gracefully to her shoulders, a drastic change in length since Mabel last saw her. She dressed more casually than she formerly did, not because she didn’t care about her appearance, but because she didn’t care about how her parents wanted her to look. “Yeah, um, I was hoping we could, like... start over? And actually... be friends this summer.”

Mabel beamed. “Cool! That means you’re qualified for a Mabel-Certified-Hug-Of-Reunitement!”

”Wait, I didn’t agree to—“ Pacifica said fruitlessly, for Mabel’s arms encased her in less than a second. She awkwardly patted Mabel’s back in return.

When Mabel pulled away, the other girl’s cheeks flushed pink, but she didn’t seem to notice. “I like the hair, by the way.”

“Oh—thanks.” Pacifica smiled shyly.

Wendy observed this peculiar interaction and raised an eyebrow, but didn’t speak. Ford, Stan, and Dipper then joined them outside.

”Happy to see you still rocking my hat,” Wendy pulled Dipper into a quick but sweet hug, a rare occurrence for her-she typically didn’t initiate hugs. She herself wore Dipper’s pine tree cap.

Dipper smiled radiantly, adjusting Wendy’s fluffy hat on his head. “And I’ll say the same for you.”

As Dipper and Mabel conversed with the girls, Soos approached Stan and Ford, who chatted a short distance away from the others.

“So, I was thinking I could take the kids to the pool?” Soos suggested. “Also, I already told the others we were going, so if you say no then you’re gonna have to deal with a bunch of upset teenagers.”

Stan clapped his hand on Soos’ back with a laugh. “Smart move, Soos. I’ll come along too. What about you, Fordsie? Did you have nerd plans for today?”

“I’m offended that you considered I would spend my first day reunited with my great niece and nephew holed up in a lab.” Ford declared, but in a casual tone, signaling that he understood Stan’s query wasn’t serious.

The two interacted like this often: one would say something that appeared as an insult or aggression, but with no true mean intent behind it. The other would pick up on this and play along with it. It was the twins’ special way of expressing love to one another. A genuine argument between the two rarely happened nowadays; their recent adventures together helped reform their relationship significantly. They hadn’t been this close since their childhood.

After Dipper messily moved the unfinished game of DD&MD aside, Soos and the girls congregated in the living room as they waited for the Pines to get ready for the pool. Only a few minutes passed until the group headed out the shack.

“Okay, who wants to come in the Stanmobile?” Stan gestured toward his parked car.

“Can’t we all just pack into Soos’ truck? The smallest of us could sit in the bed.” Mabel proposed.

“Mabel, that’s probably illegal. Brilliant idea! To Soos’ truck!”

The adults, plus Wendy and Dipper, took their seats inside the truck while the others sat in the bed.

“So, Pacifica, where do you live now? Since, uh, you know, McGucket bought your mansion.” Mabel questioned, holding her feet as she sat cross-legged against the rear window.

“She lives in a fancy new house not far from the mansion,” Candy answered for her.

Pacifica crossed her arms. “Hey, it’s not that fancy, it’s only five thousand square feet. That’s, like, three thousand less than the other one... wait—sorry—why do I forget that I’m the only rich person here?”

Candy, Grenda, and Mabel exchanged glances then burst into laughter. Pacifica sighed a breath of relief, for she feared she’d offended them. She formally apologized and was ‘friends’ with Candy and Grenda before this, but they never actually hung out together; it just felt too awkward. Pacifica silently counted on Mabel to unite the group and break the tension.

Conveniently, it was Sunday, which meant a slow day at the pool; the group arrived to see no one there but a few folk relaxing in the lounge chairs. The unnaturally blue water waited for them, empty and still: the calm before the storm.

They parked the truck and entered through the gate; then mere seconds passed before Soos kicked off his flip flops and threw his shirt onto an unsuspecting Stan and jumped into the water with a massive _SPLASH_!

“Soos, wait up!” Wendy called after him as she jogged over to the nearest empty pool chair, dumping her tote onto it and stripping the oversized t-shirt she wore over her swimsuit, along with her sandals and her hat. Dipper stuck close behind her and followed suit, then the two jumped in together.

Last summer, Dipper would have lost his mind over swimming with Wendy, and the high waisted swimsuit she wore. But Dipper’s romantic feelings evolved into a platonic love for the girl, and Dipper gazed at her smile as she splashed Soos, and saw one of his best friends, rather than his crush.

Mabel and the girls soon joined, leaving the grunkles to relax in the pool chairs next to where everyone’s towels and bags were dumped. Ford, dressed in swim trunks and a long sleeve tee, pulled out the novel Dipper gifted him and started to read.

(Dipper and Mabel each brought gifts to their grunkles upon their arrival; Mabel’s being the aprons, and Dipper’s his favorite fantasy novel for Ford and the latest issue of _Gold Chains for Old Men_ for Stan.)

“Heh, I gotta hand it to you, Ford,” Stan leaned back into his chair and applied sunscreen to his arms. “I’m kinda surprised you didn’t show up in your whole turtleneck deal.”

“No, just because I’m in swimwear doesn’t mean you’re allowed to splash me or push me in, Stanley.” Ford flipped a page of his book.

“You know damn well that saying I’m not ‘ _allowed_ ’ to do something only makes me wanna do it more.”

Ford looked to his brother and gave him a small smile. “Just don’t get the book wet.”

“Deal.”

****

After giving a Dipper a rundown of her school year and the status of her friend group, Wendy asked him about his own school year.

“Er... uneventful. Just like any other year, really.” Dipper shrugged. This wasn’t the complete truth, but he didn’t wish to get into all that quite yet. “I’m just glad to be done with middle school.”

“Amen to that,” Wendy laughed as she pushed him lightly. “I don’t wanna give you fake news by saying high school is that much better, but middle school is definitely the worst.”

“Yeah...” Dipper looked down to the surface of the water. “Mabel and I have friends at home, but... they’re not like you guys. Gravity Falls feels more like home than Piedmont. And, to be honest, I think I’m closer to my grunkles than my parents. Is that crazy?”

Wendy placed her hand on the boy’s shoulder reassuringly. “Not at all. I mean, dude, as soon as I found out your family was planning on coming back here for the summer, I basically counted down the days. Last year I had the best summer of my life, even with the whole apocalypse biz.”

“I did too. Thank you, Wendy.”

”Don’t mention it, kid.” She punched his shoulder affectionately.

****

Mabel and Pacifica were the first two to get out in a big game of conversation, so Pacifica struck up—coincidentally—a conversation.

“Hey, um, I don’t think I ever apologized for how I treated you before,” She said while touching up her hair, which she’d tied up into a ponytail.

“Hmm, you could’ve called me or something, you know.” Mabel raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t have to keep me waiting nine months to know that you wanted to be friends.”

“I was still... growing... then. Not just physically, but also, like, ugh, I don’t know how to describe it...”

Mabel tilted her head. “Like a redemption arc?”

Pacifica’s face shifted to a look of pure bewilderment. “A what?”

The other girl’s eyes lit up with excitement. “Ohoho, now we have some shows to watch! Do you wanna start coming by the shack to hang out? I mean, we could go to your place, but I know your parents are all—ahem,” Mabel enabled her most exaggerated pompous voice. “ _‘I’m a prissy capitalist who has no respect for anyone with less money than me.’_ So I just assumed you’d be more comfortable coming to me.”

Pacifica laughed, a genuine, airy laugh that Mabel realized she’d never heard. Suddenly, she wanted to hear this way more often. “That was spot on. And, yes, definitely, absolutely!” Pacifica’s cheeks reddened, then she cleared her throat and crossed her arms. “I mean—um, yeah, sure... I guess. But when? Don’t you have weekly sleepovers with Candy and Grenda?”

“Psh, starting now it’s gonna be weekly sleepovers with Candy, Grenda, and you! If that’s cool with everyone, of course.” Mabel looked away, suddenly less naturally confident than her typical self. “And, um, if you wanna hang out, just the two of us, outside of that, that would be... fun.”

“Um—yes. Sure. Yeah.”

The two fell quiet. Typically, Mabel could effortlessly carry a conversation with anyone. But she felt shy and slightly flustered in this case—which confused her, because that rarely _ever_ happened.

But Candy soon saved the girls’ awkward silence as she called them over to start the next round of the game. “Um, did I interrupt something?” She asked.

“What? Psh, no!” Mabel’s already rosy cheeks flushed as she forced a cough into her elbow. “Am I coughing? Haha!”

Pacifica stared at her nails, avoiding eye contact.

Candy crossed her arms and squinted but didn’t press the girls further.

****

Stan took notice of Ford, who slipped a bookmark into his novel and placed it in his bag next to his chair.

“Finally, are you ready to actually swim now? I was nice enough to hang out with you so you don’t look like a total loser, but I’m bored.” Stan complained.

“Heh, alright, I suppose I am.”

”Wow, that was surprisingly easy.”

When the grunkles joined the others in the water, Mabel gasped. “Two scrapbook-ortunities in the first day! Now this summer is off to a great start!”

She quickly scurried out the pool and to her towel in which she’d wrapped up her camera in. “Now everyone pose!”

****

After an exhaustingly entertaining day of swimming, Soos dropped off everyone back at their homes.

“I’m impressed, Ford,” Stan started as the family returned to the shack, opening the front door. “You should try to have fun without involving math equations or stuff like that more often.”

”Hey, don’t act like I didn’t engage in your type of fun in the past nine months. I even helped you commit crimes!”

“Woah, you two have got to tell me and Dip about your adventures! I wonder if it aligns with Soos’ fanfic...?” Mabel pondered.

“Mabel, I’m going to ask you again what a _‘fanfic’_ is.” Ford frowned with naive confusion.

“Yeah, me too. And I wasn’t even dimension-hopping for thirty years like Sixer! I’m just old.” Stan said as he took a seat in his recliner.

“Trust me, you’re better off not knowing.” Dipper grimaced. Dipper and Mabel laughed then went upstairs to go change out of their swimsuits.

Ford only appeared more perplexed, but turned his attention to Stan. “Stanley, we need to begin making dinner for the kids soon. Did you buy everything on the list I wrote for you at the grocery store?”

“If you intend to do this in the next two hours, then it’s not gonna be a we, because _The Dutchess Approves 2: The Disapproval_ is on and I’m already comfortable.” Stan leaned the chair back. “But don’t worry, I actually followed your list this time and didn’t buy an _‘unreasonable’_ amount of instant ramen. It was tempting, though. I still don’t see why we can’t eat it every day, it’s so cheap!”

Ford, who’d already made his way to the kitchen, groaned. “You haven’t even changed out of your swimwear. Not only are you most likely giving yourself a rash, but you’re also letting pool water seep into the chair.”

“This chair’s been through hell and back and still hugs my butt like it did when I first sat on it in ‘82, I’m sure some chlorine—ate—chlorinated water—? Won’t make a difference. I’ll be in charge of dinner tomorrow.”

“1982, the year I was sucked into the portal. That was my chair before yours, Stanley.” Ford rummaged through the upper cabinet, picking out a box of pasta and ingredients to make sauce.

“Oh, hush, you love me.”

Ford chuckled softly. “Yes, Stanley, I do.”


	2. movie night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the kids help stan make attractions for the shack and meet wendy’s gf. wendy stays over for a movie night with dipper and he opens up to her.

The following night, Mabel awoke abruptly from a dream she’d already forgotten. She sat up and felt around the bedside table until she found her flip phone (well, her and Dipper’s shared flip phone.) and checked the time: 2:27 a.m.

Her eyes adjusted to the dark and she noticed her brother’s empty bed. She needed to use the restroom, anyway, so she figured she’d go find him. Upon leaving the room, she heard muffled voices from downstairs. She couldn’t make out the words, but instantly recognized them as Dipper and Ford’s voices. Were they  _still_ playing DD&MD?

After taking care of business in the bathroom, Mabel carefully went downstairs, taking slow steps since she could hardly see, the only light coming from the living room. Mabel heard the conversation now, and, yep, her suspicion proved correct: they spoke in nerd language.

“Have you guys been playing nonstop since after dinner?” Mabel questioned groggily, facing her brother and great uncle as she stood in the doorway.

Dipper yelped like a hurt puppyand quickly turned around to look at her. Ford jumped slightly.

“Despite a couple bathroom and snack breaks, yes, Mabel. To be fair, we’ve only been playing for a few hours. Is there something wrong?” Ford asked, clearly oblivious to how much time had passed.

“Um, does, like, six hours count as a few? It’s past two a.m.” Mabel rubbed her eyes, still not fully awake.

Dipper narrowed his eyes. “What? No way. I could’ve sworn it was ten or something.” He then checked his bare wrist, expecting to see his watch. “Oh. I don’t have my watch on.”

“My apologies, Dipper! I would’ve sent you to bed already if I had known how late it was. You should go off to sleep, I’ll clean this up.” Ford began to gather up the mess sprawled all over the room.

Dipper stood up and stretched. “Don’t worry, Grunkle Ford, I’ve had later nights. Are you sure you don’t want help cleaning up?”

“Yes, yes, you need more sleep than I do. And Stanley might have lifted your official bedtime since you’re teenagers now, but that doesn’t mean he won’t be upset with me for keeping you up so late. The sooner you’re asleep, the better, Dipper.” Ford waved him off as he continued to clean up.

“Well, okay. Goodnight, Grunkle Ford.”

“Goodnight, you sleep well. You too, Mabel.”

“Hasta luego, or whatever goodnight is in Spanish! Have sweet, nerdy dreams!” Mabel waved to Ford, then went back upstairs, Dipper following.

Seven or so hours after she fell back asleep, Mabel arose, ready for the day. Waddles and her brother didn’t seem to be waking up anytime soon, so she decided to leave them be. She found Stan in the kitchen, eating a bowl of concerningly sugar-loaded cereal.

“I guess the homemade breakfast was only a first-day treat?”

Stan lifted his eyes from his cereal to his niece. “Sorry, pumpkin, Ford said he’d be in charge of making us some grub but he’s still asleep. He’s always up before me, so that’s straight  _weird._ ”

Mabel approached the cabinets, then opened and grabbed a bowl from one, then a spoon from the utensil drawer. “Wow, I’m surprised you didn’t just wake him up.”

“Heh, believe me, I considered it. Figured I’d let the old man get his rest, though.” 

Mabel took a seat across from him and poured herself a serving from the open box of  _Overly Sensitive Owls_ on the table. “I’m sure he slept in because he was up late playing his nerd game with Dipper. If I hadn’t sent them to bed like their mom then they probably would’ve stayed up all night. Dip’s still out cold, too.”

Stan snorted. “Yeesh, and they think  _they’re_ the mature ones. Wait, are you eating that dry?” He gestured to Mabel’s bowl.

“Yeah! If you eat these with milk then all the sugar dissolves and they’re not as sweet. Plus, the crunch is the best part, and it goes away when they’re soggy.” Mabel said through a mouthful of cereal.

“What? The sogginess is perfect! It even waters down that gross stale flavor when you’re eatin’ from an old box,” Stan argued, pointing his spoon at Mabel between bites.

Mabel crossed her arms and smirked. “Nice try, but we bought this at the store yesterday. I know this isn’t from the civil war era or something, but I wouldn’t put that past you.”

Stan laughed and set his spoon down after finishing his bowl. “Lucky for you, Soos’ abuelita threw out all the food dated before 2010. Which I  _personally_ think is a waste of valuable resources, but whatever.”

Dipper and Ford came to eat breakfast an hour later. Not long after eating, Ford set off to run errands for Fidds, as he’d told the kids. 

“I’m just gathering scientific suppplies. I promise, I wouldn’t go on any engaging adventure without you,” He assured Dipper and Mabel as he stepped out the back door. “I’ll be back for dinner!” He shut the door behind him.

Mabel turned to face her brother. “You wanna watch TV?”

“Sure. Not much else to do.”

They watched a couple episodes of Ducktective, then Stan walked into the living room, surprisingly fully clothed, in brown pants and an auburn corduroy jacket over a solid red t-shirt. The kids still weren’t quite adjusted to seeing him without his Mr. Mystery suit and hat all the time. “Hey, Soos just got here and the shack is openin’ in a few. I promised ‘im I’d make attractions so I’m recruiting you two to help since you’re not doing anything.”

“What? The shack is open? I thought you told Soos he didn’t have to run it while we were here.” Dipper replied.

“Oh, I did. But the guy loves it and didn’t want to stop. Wendy said that she needs that job to stay in town, too, so you have ‘im to thank for her being here.” Stan started towards the kitchen. “Now come on, these taxidermy parts aren’t gonna glue themselves together.”

The twins joined Stan after dressing up: Mabel in her iconic sweater-skirt look, Dipper in a graphic tee and shorts.

They worked at the kitchen table, an odd blend of taxidermy parts and various arts and crafts supplies strewn across it.

“Grunkle Stan, isn’t this unsanitary?” Dipper frowned as he applied glue to a pigeon head.

“ _You’re_ unsanitary, Dipper! Zing!” Mabel gave Stan a passionate high five, causing him to wince in pain.

The trio worked for roughly an hour; Dipper and Stan already knocked out a few, while Mabel kept busy adding detail to her first.

“Mabel, sweetie, I know you’re expressing your, uh...  _creative vision_ _,_ as you called it... but I think that’s enough googly eyes. You can finish that up.” Stan suggested, eyeing Mabel’s creation. The only way it could be described is flashy, and very...  _ Mabel. _

“Oh, don’t worry, I was almost done anyway. It just needs a little more glitter...”

They finished their work, then relaxed for a bit. Dipper checked his watch.

“Oh! Hey, Wendy’s shift should’ve started by now. You wanna go visit her in the gift shop, Mabel?”

“Count me in!”

They entered the gift shop to see Melody restocking the shelves with more merch, and Wendy talking to a tan girl with dark curly hair at the register.

“Hey, Melody! I don’t think we’ve had a formal conversation since we got attacked by murderous animatronics.” Mabel greeted her cheerfully.

Melody spun around to face them with a warm smile. “Oh, hey, kids! Wow, Soos was right when he said you two looked older. Welcome back.”

“Thanks! And speaking of, how are you two?” Mabel winked and nudged the woman.

“Mabel, you can’t just ask people personal questions like that!” Dipper elbowed her.

Melody laughed sweetly. “No worries, I don’t mind. We’re doing better than ever. Deciding to move here was probably the best decision I’ve ever made in my life.”

Mabel grinned from ear to ear. “ _Eeee!_ You have no idea how glad I am to hear that. Well, Dip Dop and I are gonna go say hi to Wendy. TTYL!”

“Okay, see you later.”

“Did you just use a text acronym in a verbal conversation?” Dipper asked Mabel as they approached the register.

“Yeah? And?” Mabel stuck her tongue out at him, then waved enthusiastically at Wendy. “Hi Wendy!”

Wendy turned toward the twins and returned the wave. “Hey guys, perfect timing! I want you to meet someone. This is my girlfriend, Arabella. But you can call her Bella.” She reached out and clutched Bella’s hand, which rested on the counter as she leaned against it from the opposite side.

“I’m so stoked to finally meet you guys, Wendy’s told me a lot about you. Based off what I know, you two are the coolest thirteen-year-olds I’ve ever met.” Bella offered out her free hand.

“Wow, thanks! Handshakes are too formal, though. High five!” Mabel raised her palm, and Bella hit it with a grin. “Wendy, I didn’t know you liked girls.” Mabel said this in a casual, intrigued tone—far from a judgemental one.

“Eh, yeah, it never really came up,” Wendy said nonchalantly. “I’m not the ‘coming out’ type. I just introduced Bella as my girlfriend to everyone and went on with it... Although Melody  did have to help me explain the concept of bisexuality to Soos. It was funny, really. He got it confused with being ambidextrous.”

Dipper snorted. “That sounds like him. He was accepting, though, right?”

“Oh, of course. You know him, he’s like a human golden retriever. Everyone around here is pretty relaxed about this kind of stuff.” Wendy squeezed Bella’s hand.

Bella checked her phone. “I should get going, my shift starts soon. I’ll be back to pick you up at around ten?”

Wendy leaned over the counter and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. “Yep, sounds good. See you then.”

Bella paused at the door before leaving. “It was nice meeting you!”

“You too!” The twins called out to her.

Mabel looked back to Wendy after Bella left. “Ten p.m.? Doesn’t the shack close at five?”

“Dipper didn’t tell you? I’m staying after work so we can have a movie night.”

Mabel blinked. “No, he didn’t.”

“Don’t worry, Mabes, we can plan something for the three of us soon. Or just us two for some girl time, if you’d like that better,” Wendy reassured. 

Mabel nodded, content with this proposal. She looked around the empty shop. “Wow, it’s real quiet today.”

Wendy shrugged. “Eh, it’s normal for a Monday. We do get a little more business each day than we used to, though, since Soos changed the schedule to make Fridays off.”

“Hey, Wendy?” Melody caught their attention from across the shop. “Can you finish restocking for me? I’m gonna go talk to Soos since there aren’t any customers here.”

Wendy hummed in response and walked to the box of merch and took over her job.

“Oh, check the kitchen, I think Stan’s showing him the new attractions.” Dipper advised to Melody on her way out.

“Thanks to both of you!”

“Wow, Wendy, I never thought I’d see the day you’d willingly step in for someone’s job like that.” Dipper joked, catching up behind her.

“Pfft, me neither, dude. But Soos and Melody are so nice that it’s hard to say no to them. It was way easier to ignore Stan’s orders.”

Mabel giggled. “I can believe that.”

****

The kids hung out for awhile and greeted Ford when he returned.

“Hey Grunkle Ford! Wendy’s staying here a few more hours, could we make dinner for her too?” Dipper asked Ford.

“Hello, Dipper! Stan’s in charge of supper tonight, he’s the one to ask. I’m sure he’ll say yes, though.”

“What? Feed another teenager in this house free of charge? Who do you think I am? I saved the world!” Stan retaliated after Dipper found him in the kitchen and asked him.

Dipper crossed his arms and squinted at him.

“Okay, okay, I’m kidding, sure. But I still think I have the right to tax everyone since I saved the world. I’ll call it—“ He waved his hands away from one another in a presenting manner. “The Stax! It’s like, Stan and tax put together—“

“Thanks Stan!” Dipper bolted out and into the gift shop.

“Hmph. No one ever listens.” Stan muttered.

“I’m listening. But wouldn’t it be ironic for you to tax people when you don’t pay any taxes yourself?” Mabel thought aloud, still in the kitchen with Stan.

“Mabel, you genius!” Stan grabbed her shoulders and threw her a devilish grin. “First I’ll get the government to lift all my taxes—because I saved the world—then I’ll enforce the Stax! The tax evader becomes the tax collector!”

“Thirteen years of my life and I still have only a vague idea of what taxes are!” Mabel said with equal enthusiam.

****

After Wendy’s shift ended, she joined Mabel in a channel-surfing session while Dipper and Ford sat at the living room table discussing the novel the former gifted the latter.

“That’s my favorite part! I love how it contributes to the buildup to chapter seven, when—“ Dipper exclaimed, but was interrupted by Stan from the kitchen, shouting with superfluous volume considering the rooms’ lack of a door separating them.

“Dinner!”

“Oh, sorry Wendy, we only have four chairs here. You can sit on, uh, the floor or something.” Stan told Wendy a couple minutes later as she served her plate.

“Have some hospitality, Stanley.” Ford scolded as he sat down with his meal.

“Hospitality? That sounds like a made-up word.”

“It’s whatever, I’ll just sit at the living room table with Dipper.” Wendy shrugged.

“Fine by me,” Dipper trailed behind her as she went back to the living room.

“And I’ll keep you two company,” Mabel beamed, taking her seat.

Ford lowered his voice. “Does Dipper still have feelings for her?”

“Oh, psh, he’s over Wendy. He actually had a  new romance earlier this year, so I think his whole deal with Wendy is over.” Mabel replied.

“Wait, when you say romance, do you mean a crush, or did the girl actually like ‘im back?” Stan’s tone indicated that he didn’t believe this was possible.

“Heh, it actually wasn’t a g—“ Mabel’s hands flew to her mouth. After a few seconds, she grabbed her fork and shoveled macaroni into her mouth, followed by a hard swallow. “Ahem! Anyways! This macaroni is really good!”

Stan and Ford’s eyebrows raised in unison.

“Uh, thanks, sweetie. Glad you like it.”

****

Mabel answered a phone call from Grenda after she ate and went up to the attic; knowing Grenda’s calls, she’d be occupied for at least the next hour. Ford set off to deliver the supplies he’d obtained earlier to Fidds and to help him work for a bit. Stan left for, as he told the others, “unnamed reasons” which definitely meant he planned on committing a crime or two—or God knows how many. This left Dipper and Wendy, about to start their movie night.

Dipper turned on the TV and browsed the channels. “Ugh, there’s nothing good on, as usual. You wanna dig through Stan’s movies and see what he has?”

“Yeah, sure. I’ll bet whatever he has beats  _The Planet People of Planet Planet_.” Wendy tossed a piece of popcorn into her mouth.

Dipper found a box of movies in the storage room and placed it on the table. “Um, do you want a romantic period drama or a cheesy 80’s movie?”

“Dude, is that even a question?”

Dipper inserted the VHS of the cheesy 80’s movie.

The two ate popcorn and made fun of the movie’s dialogue. Dipper let Wendy have the recliner while he sat on the floor, leaning against it.

“Hey, Wendy, can I tell you something? You aren’t, like, too focused on the movie, right?” Dipper finally asked after spending the previous five minutes building up the courage to start this conversation.

“I already predicted the ending, and considering how cliche it’s been so far, I have no doubt that I’m right—so no. What’s up?”

Dipper still faced the TV, away from Wendy, but he could feel her curious stare. “Yesterday, at the pool, when you asked me if anything happened this school year, I lied and said no.”

“Oh? What happened, then?” She tapped his shoulder to get him to turn around. “...It’s serious, isn’t it?”

“I guess, but... I don’t want it to be,” He faced Wendy now, but couldn’t bring himself to make eye contact.

“Then it doesn’t have to be. Just be casual about it. Act like it’s just another normal thing,” She advised with a small smile.

Dipped nodded and drew a deep breath. “Okay, well... I had a... romance? I guess? That’s what Mabel called it.”

Wendy made a ‘go on’ gesture with her hand.

“It was this... boy from one of my classes. I started to feel about him like how I felt about you, and it scared me, because I...” He rubbed his neck. “I’d never had feelings for a boy before.”

Dipper finally looked up to Wendy, who wore an expectant smile. “Don’t leave me hanging, did you end up together?”

Dipper’s tense shoulders relaxed. “Oddly enough, we kinda did? I would have never confessed, but he was the one who did first. He was my first kiss.”

“Whoa-ho-ho, you got _game_ , Dipper!” Wendy cheered. “What happened next?”

“We spent a lot of time together, but then I realized I’d just been infatuated. He was just another crush. The feeling was mutual and we split, but we’re still friends.” Dipper smiled to himself, feeling light as a feather.

“I’m really glad you told me this, kid. And it’s great that you didn’t have to deal with a rough breakup. I’ve been through plenty of those... not fun.”

Dipper chuckled. “Weren’t you usually the one calling off the relationship, though?”

Wendy punched his shoulder. “Oh, shush. You’re right, but still.”


	3. super awesome family bonding plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ford takes mabel to a village of a newly discovered species deep in the forest, but are dragged into doing an annoying task for them. meanwhile, dipper and stan connect over a shared interest back at the shack.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just to clear up any confusion, the species mabel and ford encounter is genderless, which is why all of them are referred to with they/them pronouns. anyways my goal for this chapter was for it to play out like an actual episode of the show, and i hope i did that well! took me awhile to write but i think im content w it

“Kids, Stanley and I are free for the day and would like to hang out with you. Do you have any ideas of what you’d like to do?” Ford announced the next day, finding Dipper and Mabel out on the back patio couch, eating lunch.

Mabel gasped. She turned to Waddles, leaned over and whispered into his ear. He oinked in response. She paused for a moment, then leaned in to whisper again. The pig snorted.

Mabel gave Waddles a thumbs-up and turned back to face Ford and Dipper, who waited expectantly.

“Waddles and I have agreed that this is the perfect opportunity to execute my Super Awesome Family Bonding Plans!” She declared.

Ford and Dipper exchanged a curious look. This was no different than Mabel’s usual antics, but they were uninformed of this plan she’d been brewing.

“So, are you gonna tell us what that is, or...?” Dipper scratched his elbow.

“Oh! Yeah! Sometimes I forget we don’t have a twin hive mind. Anyways! Since me and Stan, the fun ones, and you two, the nerdy ones, usually get along better, I planned a day where I can strengthen my bond with Ford, while Dipper strengthens his bond with Stan! We’ll be separated to maximize the bond-y-ness!” Mabel rambled at a speedy pace, not taking a breath once.

Dipper blinked. “Can’t we just all hang out together?”

Mabel groaned. “Ughhh, did you even listen?! We. Need. To be. Separated. To  _maximize the bond-y-ness!”_

Ford stroked his chin. “In Dipper’s defense, you talk so fast that it’s often difficult to understand and process your words. But I do think that’s a good idea. What did you have planned, specifically, Mabel?”

Mabel beamed, showcasing her magenta braces. “I’m glad you asked! For you and me, I was thinking we could try to invent glitter bombs, and then talk about our biggest regrets—“

Ford tugged at his collar. “As, um—great as that sounds, Mabel—there’s actually something new I discovered in the woods that I think you’d like to see. I could take you there and show you, if that’s alright.”

“Ooh, sounds fun!”

“But Ford, I wanna see it too!” Dipper whined.

“No worries, my boy, I’m sure whatever you do with Stan will be equally interesting and fun. And if you really wish to see this discovery, I can take you to it another time.” Ford ruffled Dipper’s hat.

Dipper sighed, but nodded, incapable of objecting against his grunkle.

****

“Okay, uh, let’s read this plan she made for us,” Stan said as he sat at the living room table with Dipper, holding an overly bedazzled sheet of paper that appeared to be torn out of a diary of sorts. _“‘_ _Take five minutes to draw out your feelings using the provided glitter pens and then when you’re done explain what the drawing means to one another_ _...’_ Sweet Sally, what is this, a fifth grade school counseling circle?”

Dipper let out a short laugh. “Maybe we can bond over not wanting to do this.”

“Ha! Actually, kid, I’ve been fixin’ to show ya something for awhile, and I guess now’s a good time for that. You stay here, just gimme a sec.” Stan stood up and left to go to the storage room.

He shortly returned, holding a box of records. “Imma let you in on a little secret. Take a look at these.” He set the box down on the table.

Dipper stood up to get a better look. He examined the titles along the edge of each vinyl. Some old psychedelic rock, jazz classics, and...

_“BABBA?”_ Dipper blurted, his voice an octave higher with delight.

“Heh, yep! Started collecting ‘em back in the 70’s. I even stole some of the more expensive ones. But nowadays you can find a decent amount at a thrift or book store for pretty cheap.” Stan patted the side of the box proudly.

“But... last summer you made fun of me for liking them. Why?” Dipper frowned up at him.

Stan forced a cough, trying to mask his guilt. “I, um, kinda got made fun of for this too in the past. And I guess I just took that out on you when I should’ve taken the opportunity to, uh,  _bond_ with you... over a shared interest. Sorry about that, kid.”

Dipper smiled slightly. “You let people make you insecure over your music taste? I thought you were supposed to be tough.”

“Ugh, I know! And the people responsible only listened to those dad rock bands whose songs all sound the same. But just because someone seems tough doesn’t mean they’re not sensitive on the inside,” Stan preached as he flipped through the vinyls, looking for one to pick out.

“Wow, Stan... are you being vulnerable with me?” Dipper asked him in a teasing tone.

Stan looked up to Dipper with a cold stare. “I could easily take everything I just said back, put this all away and pay you to act like this never happened. Also, vulnerability is a concept made up by weak people.”

“Okay, okay... Oh! Do you have  _Super Cooper_?  That’s one of my favorite albums.”

****

Meanwhile, Mabel and Ford strolled through the forest.

“I tried to make sure we’re on the safest path possible—there’s been far too many Kill Billy incidents around the path I’d typically take. This one takes a bit longer to get there, but I’d say the scenery makes up for it.” Ford admired the patches of glowing mushrooms along the trail.

“That’s okay, the longer it takes us to get there, the more of a surprise it’ll be!” Mabel hopped along beside Ford, jumping from each larger rock wedged into the dirt to another. “Actually, I wanna know what it is now.”

“Mabel, I’ve lost count of how many times you’ve changed your mind on that since we left.”

“You’re right, nevermind! Surprise reveals are too fun for you to just cast it aside and tell me now. Anyways, I think we should come up with a name for our daring duo,” She pumped a fist.

“Alright, perhaps we could base it off of something we have in common? What are our shared interests?” Ford thought for a moment. “Let’s see... jelly beans, turtleneck sweaters—“

“Ooh! Ooh! It’s gotta be related to the sweaters! Hmm... Sweater Buddies? Turtleneck Pals? No, those are stupid! It needs to have a punch to it...” Mabel rubbed her temples, deep in thought.

“My apologies, Mabel, I’d suggest something if I had any ideas, but my typically active mind is blank.” Ford patted her shoulder.

“Oh! How about...  _the Thread Friends!_ It annoys me that it’s not an actual rhyme, but it’s the best I can think of for now.”

“Heh, I think it’s just fine, Mabel.”

****

“Grunkle Stan, I am  _not_ dancing,” Dipper stated as he watched Stan groove to BABBA.

“Oh, come on. I know for a fact that you do it on your own, why can’t you dance with me?”

“You’re gonna laugh at me.”

“Look, kid, if there’s one thing I know about dancing, it’s that you don’t have to be good at it. Even if you’re the absolute worst, as long as you’re havin’ fun it doesn’t matter. Now get up and dance so I don’t have to keep being all wise and compassionate. It gives me heartburn.”

Dipper laughed and finally stood up and began to sway with the music. His movements started off tense and awkward, but with encouragement from Stan, he gradually became more comfortable.

“Wow, Stan, you’re actually pretty good at dancing,” Dipper complimented.

“The ‘actually’ wasn’t necessary, but thanks. Used t’pickup babes with these moves. And I bet I still could.” He winked. “You’re not too bad yourself. Still a little stiff, but you got rhythm.”

Dipper loosened up slightly. “Thanks, Stan.”

“Heh, you’re just like Ford. Few months ago I took ‘im to this nightclub up in the East Coast that I was banned from back in the 70’s.”

“Wait, how’d you go back if you were banned? And why  _were_ you banned?” Dipper cut in.

“First of all, don’t ask. Second, they banned one of my fake identities. They didn’t have my actual name and almost forty years was enough to make me unrecognizable. Anyway, I took ol’ Fordsie there for a night out while we were docked in town, and he was being such a  wuss . What is it with nerds and hating fun?”

“Hey—“

Stan didn’t give him the chance to go on. “So after a lot—and I mean _a lot_ —of convincing I finally got him out on the dance floor, and he started off all awkward like you, moving like he had a stick up his—“ Stan cleared his throat. “Can’t say that. But I coaxed that braniac into it like I’m doin’ with you, and he ended up havin’ fun.”

Dipper beamed up at his uncle. “Could you tell me more stories about all that? You two can’t just go adventuring and not tell Mabel and I everything.”

Stan walked over to the record player and turned the volume down. “Sure, kid, we’ll take a break. Don’t you think we’re done dancing, though, I was just gettin’ warmed up.”

****  


“Here we are, Mabel!” Ford announced with pride, gesturing toward a large, dead tree, with vines from the neighboring trees hanging over it.

Mabel tilted her head. “Your discovery is a dead tree?”

Ford patted Mabel’s shoulder and led her closer to the tree, then held his index finger to his lips and lowered his voice. “It’s so much more than that, I promise you. Follow my lead, and stay silent, alright?”

Mabel resisted the urge to verbally express her excitement. She nodded and crept behind Ford as he carefully approached the tree. Once he reached it, he leaned against its side. In the tree was a hole, large enough for a small rodent to be able to go into—and just large enough for Ford to be able to move aside the thick layer of vines that obstructed it and steal a quick look inside. A sweet smile spread on his lips and he pulled away and gave Mabel his signal: a point toward the opening with his thumb. He backed away and let a silently ecstatic Mabel lean in and take a peek.

She covered her mouth to stop herself from gasping.

In the hollows of the tree lived a village of what appeared to be moth-like fairies. The architecture of the village ranged; most of what Mabel assumed were houses were little mushrooms that’d been hollowed out and reinforced with wood, but still kept their charming mushroom look. Others were carved out of the ridges of the tree, along the outer edges. Some looked to be built entirely out of miniscule twigs and parts of leaves. But despite the differences, all the buildings complemented one another and fit incredibly well with the village’s aesthetic. The ground, mostly the wood of the tree, included patches of dirt with grass and a few weeds which added extra color and acted as trees for the creatures. These creatures roamed the lively town—all different shades of blue, yellow, and pink. With patches of this colorful fur they resembled poodle moths, but their bodies appeared anthropogenic other than their wings, antennae, and an extra set of arms. They all wore clothes that appeared to be made of leaves.

To put it simply, Mabel was staring directly at cute little moth people who lived in mushrooms, and asking her not to freak out at the sight is a pointless request.

“Oh. My. Gosh.”

The fairies gasped in shock and all looked at Mabel, only a fraction of her face visible. Fairies who were formerly in their homes came out to see the situation.

“Human! We want no business with you, get out of here!” One shouted, pointing an accusing (but adorably small) finger at her.

“Awwww, even when you’re angry it’s adorable!”

Ford quickly nudged Mabel aside and revealed himself to the fairies. “No worries, she’s with me! She’s family of mine and I believe she’s incredibly astonished by your species and would like to be familiar with your culture.”

“Oh, why didn’t you say so, Ford! Any friend of yours is a friend of ours,” The same fairy from before said.

“Wait, what? You  know them?” Mabel asked, baffled.

“Ford’s done so much to keep us safe and isolated from the other creatures of the forest! Thanks to him, we don’t have to deal with attacks from bugs or other potential predators... Most of the time.” Another voice from the crowd chirped.

“Wow, that’s amazing! It’s too bad I can only see everything from the hole, though. I wanna be one of you guys!” Mabel complained.

“Heh, lucky for you, I figured you’d feel that way. You think I’d take you all this way to just to quietly watch these fascinating beings from a distance? The whole silence thing was just because I wanted to see how long you’d last. I brought along a tool that’s perfect for this situation.” Ford pulled out Dipper’s crystal flashlight from one of the many pockets in his trenchcoat. “You have Dipper to thank for lending me this.”

Mabel waved her arms in delight. “Of course! That’s perfect! We can shrink ourselves to their size! How are we gonna get in, though? We don’t have wings like them.”

“We can help!” A tiny voice called from inside the tree. Mabel and Ford peeked back in. The fairy from earlier now flew up closer their faces. “I’m Luren, by the way, now that we’re formally introduced.”

“I’m Mabel! I’d shake your hand but that would probably kill you.”

“Yes, um, don’t do that. Anyway! We’re allies with the dragonflies, we can call a couple over and they can give you a lift into here once you shrink yourselves. All you gotta do is hop on their back and they’ll know what to do.” Luren grinned.

“Sounds great!” Ford exclaimed, and pulled back from the hole to face a dejected Mabel. “What do you think, Mabel? Is something wrong?”

“As awesome as flying on a bug sounds, I’m a little on edge because of that watertower incident I had last summer... being shrunk will make us all high up when we’re on the dragonflies...” Mabel twirled her hair nervously.

Ford placed a comforting, six-fingered hand on Mabel’s back. “I promise you, Mabel, these people—well, they’re called maeries—are trustworthy and wouldn’t put you in a situation that could get you hurt. Since we’re already in front of it, it will be a quick flight over, then you’ll be safe in the village.”

Mabel enabled her irresistable puppy eyes. “You promise?”

Ford moved his hand to ruffle Mabel’s hair. “I promise.”

“Yeah... yeah! You’re right! I can’t pass up the opportunity to go to a literal fairy village—or, what did you call them, maeries? Just because of some dumb fear of heights.” Mabel assured.

“So, is that a yes to the offer?” Luren’s voice shouted from the hole.

Mabel stuck her hand through the hole and signaled a thumbs-up. “It sure is!”

A whistle sounded from the village. “They’ll be here any minute!” Luren said.

Ford shrunk Mabel with the flashlight, then himself.

“Uh, Ford, are we just gonna leave the flashlight out here?” Mabel looked up at the flashlight, now far too gigantic to fit into Ford’s trenchcoat.

“Yep! We’ll hitch a ride on the dragonflies as our way out and we’ll come right back here to grow ourselves again.” Ford stated confidently.

“Sounds good to me... hey, do you hear buzzing?”

The pair turned to see two dragonflies flying in their direction. They soon landed gracefully in front of Mabel and Ford.

“Wow! They’re like, the size of a horse! Well, not actually, but you know what I mean.” Mabel ran over to the closest dragonfly and postioned herself onto its back. Ford chuckled at her comment and did the same, climbing onto the other.

Mabel and Ford’s dragonflies took off. The vines hanging over the hole lightly brushed Mabel as she flew through them, giving her a ticklish sensation that made her giggle.

“Woah! It’s even cuter when you’re maerie-sized!” Mabel gaped, admiring the village as they flew towards it.

“Heh, isn’t it? I’d already been planning on shrinking myself so I could extend my research on the maeries, but I figured you’d want to be a part of that just as much, or even more than I do. I wanted to share this experience with you.”

“Aww, Grunkle Ford! Thank you for thinking of me.”

The dragonflies landed and Mabel and Ford stepped off onto the wood.

“Welcome to our humble abode! Would you like a tour? Darys knows everything about this place, they’ll make a  fantastic tour guide!” Luren greeted and gestured toward another maerie that must’ve been Darys, who appeared younger and had bright eyes and pink fur.

“Of course! Hey, are you a teenager like me? I mean, I don’t know how long the maerie lifespan is, but...” Mabel instantly wanted to befriend Darys.

Darys laughed and nodded. “Yeah, close enough! It’s nice to meet you two. Follow me, you’re about to go on the best tour ever!”

****

Dipper caught his breath after using it all up from a deep belly-laugh. “Ha! Wow, Grunkle Stan, how does punching manage to always solve everything for you?”

Stan wiped a tear of laughter from his eye. “Well, you know me, kid, it’s kinda my thing. My history of boxing is probably the reason I’m still alive today.”

“I can believe it.”

“Wait, is that...” Stan paused for a moment and listened to the music, which he’d mostly tuned out while telling stories. “ _‘Lay All Your Adoration On Me’_ ! Alright, storytime’s over. We gotta dance to this.”

“You bet!” Dipper followed Stan to the living room’s open space that acted as their dance floor.

“Okay, kid, this is a dumb question and I can’t believe I’m even asking this, but I know all the words t’ this one, and...” Stan started as he danced.

“Are you asking if you wanna sing along together?” Dipper smirked at his grunkle.

“No—I—“ He let out an exasperated groan. “Okay. Yes. I do. But you can’t tell  anyone about this, and I mean it.”

“Deal.”

****

“And this is the Great Maerie Fountain. It may just look like a regular water fountain, but it works magically without any plumbing and its water is extremely pure.” Darys took a sip from the fountain; it looked like one you’d find in a school, but overgrown with moss. Darys pulled away and smacked their lips. “Delicious.”

“How did it get here? Did it come from somewhere else?” Ford asked, looking up from his notepad on which he jotted down notes (the man never missed a research opportunity.)

“Nope. It was here when our ancestors built the village.”

“I wanna try it!” Mabel rushed over to the fountain and drank.A few seconds passed and she pulled away. “ Woah! It somehow tastes exactly how I feel when I see a kitten! You gotta try this, Grunkle Ford!”

“Alright, I’ll have a taste... incredible! That water might be the best I’ve ever had, and I’ve drank water from a dimension where pollution doesn’t exist!”

Darys giggled. “Come on, you gotta try out one of our dandelion beds!”

A few minutes later, as Mabel and Ford explored Darys’ house, a horn sounded from outside.

“Uh, what’s that?” Mabel sat up from the couch (made out of leaves) that she laid on.

“Oh, that’s Luren! They wanted to ask a favor from you. I guess the tour’s over, then. I think they’re waiting for you by the brewing house. It’s in the upper level.” Darys opened the front door for Mabel and Ford.

“A favor...? I wasn’t expecting that. Well, I’ll go speak with them. You can stay here with Darys and finish the tour if you’d like, Mabel.” Ford approached the door.

Mabel jumped off the couch and caught up to Ford. “Nah, I wanna help! You never know if my creative genius will be  desperately needed.”

The upper level was the part of the village where structures were carved into the tree, reserved for shops and utility. The duo found Luren in front of what must have been the brewing house—a small room hollowed out from the wood, full of shelves of different potions and ingredients, with a cauldron in the middle.

“So, there’s been an increase of big bugs just waltzing in here like they own the place, and I’ve been trying to brew a repellant to use against them. But every time I think I finally got it right, it doesn’t work on the magical bugs, only the normal ones. I think I just need one more ingredient, but I swear, I’ve tried everything. You’re a genius, so I’m leaving it to you.” Luren paced around the cauldron and gestured to the bubbly, green goop inside it.

“Luren, my apologies, but I’m not entirely sure how can I help you with this. What’s already in this concoction, anyway?” Ford gazed into the cauldron, a hand at his chin.

“Barf from a barf fairy, unicorn tears, cowl eggs, and zombie guts. I thought it was the perfect formula, but it still doesn’t work!” Luren stomped in frustration.

“Ew, there’s barf in this?! That must be why it smells so bad,” Mabel pulled the neck of her sweater over her nose.

“Hmm, you’re right, it  _should_ be the perfect formula. I suppose I can try to see what it needs.”

“Great! Because we’re not letting either of you leave before you have it right!” Luren grinned and promptly left the room, shutting the door behind them.

Mabel and Ford looked at each other, dumbfounded.

Ford pinched the bridge of his nose and grunted. “I wanted to come here as a researching tourist, not a chemistry student.”

“It can’t be  that hard, right?” Mabel traced the edge of the cauldron with her finger. “I mean, aren’t we just making the magicky version of  _Raid_?”

“Well, I suppose you could refer to it as that, yes, but it’s more complicated, I’m afraid. This repellent needs to work on both normal bugs and the weirder, more magical ones. An ingredient that could harm one bug may make the other stronger. It’s a tough equation.”

“Grunkle Ford, you’re underestimating the power of Mabel! I’m the genius that invented Mabel Juice. This will be a breeze!” Mabel examined the shelves of ingredients. “Ooh, bloodberries! Isn’t that fun?”

“I admire your optimism, Mabel. Here, why don’t we collaborate?” Ford took a seat at the desk in the corner of the room. “You look through those shelves and tell me all of the ingredients that we have available and I’ll jot down what I know about them and if I think it might be useful.”

“You got it, boss! Let’s see...”

Mabel went through all the ingredients while Ford brainstormed.

“Oh! There are normal non magicky ingredients too! Marmalade, nutmeg, honey...”

“Wait, that might be the answer, Mabel! We already have all the magical ingredients, but what we’re missing could be a simple household one! What else is there?” Ford scribbled onto his notepad.

“Vanilla extract, suh-rear-acha...?”

“Sriracha, Mabel.”

“That’s what I said! Ooh, cinnamon! It smells so good... maybe I could just have a little taste...”

Ford’s eyes widened. “Mabel, no—I don’t think you should be eating Luren’s ingredients—“

“Too late!” Mabel screwed the cap off the container and tilted it toward her tongue. “Ugh, it’s stuck at the bottom...” She tapped the container, causing a large mound of cinnamon to fall right onto her tongue.

It only took a moment for Mabel to start coughing a brown cloud. Ford quickly ran over to her.

“You were— _eugh_ —“ Mabel hacked. “You were right, Ford. Sorry. It just smelt so good...”

Ford firmly gripped her shoulder as she leaned over, still coughing. “Wait... Mabel! You’re a genius! That’s it!”

“Of course I am!” Mabel pumped her fist. “Wait, why am I a genius?”

“The issue with the magical bugs is that they’re stronger than normal ones. When this repellent touches them, it does little to no harm, despite it being quite acidic. So in order for it to work on them, it can’t just touch their exterior, they need to eat it!”

Mabel made a noise somewhere between a gasp and a cough. “So if we put cinnamon in it, it’ll smell good so they’ll eat it, and the repellent will hurt them from the inside!”

“I think this calls for a high six, Mabel,” Ford beamed, offering his palm.

“Yes! A full finger more enthusiastic than normal!”

Ford shivered in pain. “Stanley was right, you hit  hard ...” 

“Welp! I’m gonna go have a drink from the water fountain and try to get this awful taste out of my mouth. BRB!” Mabel scurried out the room, leaving Ford to add the cinnamon to the repellent.

****

“Heh, wow, after last summer’s zombie fiasco I never imagined myself singing with one of you kids, or  anyone , ever again, and I definitely didn’t imagine enjoying it so much that we’d do—how many was that—ten songs?” Stan plopped onto his recliner, wiping his forehead.

“Mabel would be so proud of us,” Dipper laughed.

“Too bad she can’t know about this. Ever.”

“Yeah. Definitely not. But before we put it all away, let’s finish listening to this album.”

****

“I’m impressed! I’ll admit, I assumed I’d thought of everything, but making the repellent a poison to be consumed wasn’t something that crossed my mind.” Luren praised, examining the repellent.

“So, you better let us leave now.” Ford demanded gruffly.

“Oh! Yes, yes, of course. Allow me.” Luren walked out the open door and whistled into their fingers.

“There wasn’t anything else you wanted to see, right, Mabel?” Ford asked Mabel as they watched the dragonflies fly over.

“Yeah, I’m good. The whole cinnamon thing kinda killed the vibe for me.”

Ford and Mabel exchanged quick goodbyes with the maeries and flew out. The dragonflies dropped them off right by the crystal flashlight at the base of the tree, untouched. They grew back to their full size and started their way home.

“Thank you for taking me there, Ford,” Mabel said sweetly as they followed the trail back to the shack.

“Of course, Mabel. I’m glad you enjoyed it despite them making us do their dirty work.”

“It’s hard to focus on that when I got to go inside a literal mushroom house. Also, that part was kinda fun. I know I’m not Dipper, but I think the Thread Friends make a good team.”

“You’re not Dipper, but Dipper’s not you, either. I don’t need to spend all my time with just him. He doesn’t even wear turtleneck sweaters!” Ford joked.

“Ugh! Exactly! He doesn’t understand high fashion like we do,” Mabel chimed with a giggle.

As they left the forest and approached the shack, Mabel suddenly stuck out a hand in front of Ford and held the other to her ear. “Am I hearing what I think I’m hearing...?”

Ford cocked an eyebrow.

“Follow my lead.” She ordered in a whisper and slowly tiptoed over to the door. Ford complied, though confused.

Mabel pressed her ear to the door and grinned. She pulled away and loudly and abruptly opened it. “HELLO!”

Dipper and Stan jumped, Stan promptly running over to the record player to stop the music.

“That was BABBA, wasn’t it? I haven’t heard that band in over thirty years!” Ford exclaimed innocently.

“Dipper was, uh, forcin’ me to listen to it! I had no say in it.” Stan sputtered.

“Grunkle Stan, it’s 2013. Dipper and I don’t own records. They were obviously yours.” Mabel stated simply.

Ford stepped in before Stan could attempt to defend himself any further. “Stanley, are you seriously embarrassed about that? They’re a good band.”

“You don’t know the story, Sixer. People  _made_ me embarrassed about it.”

Mabel tugged at her hair. “Oh no,this is my fault, isn’t it? I’m sorry to both of you. I guess I just made fun of Dipper for it because I knew it’d make him mad, and by doing that I was making fun of Stan, too. But I like the music too! How about we all appreciate it together?”

Dipper and Stan looked at one another, surprised.

“So... you’re  _not_ gonna relentlessly tease us about it?” Stan rubbed his neck.

“That’s something the old Mabel would do. The new Mabel loves BABBA and wants to listen to them with her awesome family.”

Stan resumed the music and spoke to Ford while Mabel recounted their adventure to Dipper. “So, how’s the best brother in the multiverse doin’? Did’ja have a nice trip?”

Ford smiled and hung an arm over Stan’s shoulder. “I don’t know, you tell me. How are you doing?”

“No, I asked how y—“ Stan returned the smile. “Oh. I’m good. Great, actually.”


	4. girls’ sleepover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> focuses on mabel and pacifica, who have a sleepover at the shack. both girls face feelings of confusion and frustration, but only one actually talks about it with someone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> had to dedicate a chapter to my girls,,, my poor oblivious sapphics

A lazy Wednesday passed at the shack. Ford spent most of it working at Fidds’, while Stan was off running various errands he hadn’t bothered to elaborate on when the kids asked where he intended to go. So, this meant he could be doing something simple and innocent like shopping for car parts, or something illegal like stealing said car parts instead. Regardless, both grunkles were occupied.

This left Dipper and Mabel bored at the shack. They’d talked a bit with Soos, Wendy, and Melody, but there were extra customers at the shack keeping them busy, so they didn’t have much of a chance to socialize.

As Mabel sat on Stan’s recliner, trying to think of something to do, an idea struck. She quickly made her way up to the attic to get her phone.

_**heyyy girl!! wanna sleep over tonight :D** _

_Sent to pacifica <333_

Mabel kicked her feet as she laid stomach-down on her bed. A snort drew her attention away from the phone.

“Oh, hi Waddles, I didn’t even see you there!” Mabel sat up and lifted the pig, placing him next to her (the poor pig’s legs were too short and adorable for him to be able to jump up there himself).

She stroked Waddles for a moment, then the phone dinged. She frantically picked it up to see Pacifica’s response.

_Received from pacifica <333_

_**Sure. What time?** _

Mabel squealed in excitement.

**_laaaazy day today so come whenever!! grunkle ford’s making french toast for dinner if u want some ;)_ **

**_French toast for dinner?_ **

**_have u never had breakfast for_ ** **_dinner????? it’s da best >:3_ **

**_Okay lol. Be there at 6_ **

Mabel set down her phone and scratched behind Waddles’ ears.

“Okay Waddles, I don’t think Pacifica has ever had, like, a true friend who does true friend stuff with her, so we gotta make this perfect!”

The pig’s responded with an oink that sounded vaguely like “makeover.” Or, at least, that’s how Mabel interpreted it.

“You genius!”

Mabel grabbed the phone again and sent a quick text to Pacifica telling her to bring her makeup. Mabel had some of her own, but she knew the other would have a vast selection.

****

“Mabel, can you tell Waddles to get off the recliner? He’s not listening to me,” Dipper groaned.

Mabel looked to Waddles, who comfortably sat in an oddly human-like position on the chair. He wore his signature charmingly clueless expression. “Aww, it’s his chair as much as it is yours!” Mabel spoke in a baby voice as she squished his cheeks. “And how could I say that to his cute widdle face? Who’s a cutie? That’s you Waddles, that’s you!”

“I don’t know what I even expected,” Dipper muttered.

The door swung open, revealing Ford. “Hello, kids!”

“Oh, thank the supernatural, I was getting so bored. You can only watch Gravity Falls TV for about two hours until it’s intolerable,” Dipper ran up to him.

Mabel chortled. “ ‘Thank the supernatural’ ? Dipper, that’s like, one of the top ten corniest things I’ve ever heard you say.”

Dipper pouted. “I don’t think it was corny, Dipper.” Ford reassured.

“Thanks,” Dipper mumbled, still discouraged.

The three sat down at the kitchen table and spoke for awhile, catching each other up and then launching into random topics, like how the plot of Ducktective didn’t make sense anymore, and how Soos uploaded his fanfiction about the show online and it blew up. Ford then started to prep for the french toast as they continued to chat.

A knock sounded at the door, and Mabel shot up to her feet. “That must be Pacifica!”

“Is she eating dinner with us?” Ford asked Dipper as Mabel swiftly made her way to the door.

“Yeah, is that okay? Mabel kinda assumed it was.”

“Oh, of course, I don’t mind. My brother might be upset that we’re keep giving another free meal to one of your friends, though.” Ford said with a wink.

Dipper chuckled. “Eh, he’ll get over it. He’s too much of a softie to refuse them food, anyway.”

“Don’t tell him you said that.”

Mabel entered the kitchen, her arm linked with Pacifica’s, who appeared flushed. She wore a cropped sweater and a plaid skirt; something simple, but still to her taste. “Pacifica’s sleeping over, Grunkle Ford. I think she’d like a serving of your finest french toast once it’s ready. We’ll have enough for an extra person, right?”

Ford turned from the counter to greet Pacifica. “You make yourself at home, Pacifica. And yes, that won’t be a problem.”

“Thank you, sir.” She replied stiffly.

“Please, you can call me Ford.” He insisted.

“Sorry, habit.”

Mabel gently squeezed Pacifica’s arm, causing her ears to redden. “C’mon, let’s go put your stuff upstairs!”

Mabel led her up to the attic, leaving the boys.

“Perhaps it’s just me, but based off what I know about body language, those two like each other,” Ford commented.

“Dude, you noticed, too? I thought maybe Pacifica liked me, since we kinda had an unspoken thing last year, but she doesn’t act like that when I’m having a one-on-one with her. Only with Mabel. And they clearly have no clue the other likes them back.”

“Well, let’s leave them to figure it out. When the time is right, they’ll come to terms with their feelings.”

“I agree, but I have a feeling it’s gonna be awhile before that happens.”

Shortly after, Stan arrived and hung out with his brother and nephew, waiting for dinner to be ready.

“Dipper, could you go get the girls? This is just about ready,” Ford requested.

“Sure.” Dipper made his way tothe foot of the stairs and shouted up to the attic. “Mabel, Pacifica! Dinner!”

The girls did the same thing Dipper and Wendy did when she’d eaten dinner with them; they took the table in the living room. Meanwhile, the boys ate in the kitchen.

“So, Stan, what did you do today?” Dipper asked.

“Kid, if I didn’t tell ya earlier, I’m not tellin’ ya now.”

“What, did you go out and steal one of those sad clown paintings again?” Ford jested.

Stan averted his eyes and shoveled a bite of toast into his mouth.

“What—I wasn’t even serious, did you actually—?”

“Okay, maybe I did.” Stan said through a mouthful of bread. “But you should expect that from me at this point. I mean, to be fair, it wasn’t in some fancy schmancy art museum, jus’ some guy’s house. And he lives pretty isolated from everyone, and I knew he’d be gone till tonight, which is why I did it during the day.”

“Did you hang it up?” Dipper asked casually.

“Oh, yeah, ‘course. Up in my room.”

Ford sighed but repressed a smile.

“I can’t believe you’ve never had breakfast for dinner,” Mabel said to Pacifica in the other room after a swig of orange juice. “What do you even eat? Do you have, like, a butler with a funny accent who makes you five-starmeals every day?”

“Well, yeah, pretty much.” Pacifica shrugged. “I like this, though. Food doesn’t have to be all fancy to be good.”

“I’m glad to hear that! I’m sure downgrading from a mansion to a big house was a good first step in making you appreciate the less expensive things.”

“Heh, yeah, I’m trying to be a little more normal, even though my parents hate it...”

Mabel placed her hand on Pacifica’s that rested across the table. “I’m really proud of you for that. If something really bad ever happens with your parents and you need somewhere to go, you’re welcome here. But if you stay too long Stan might make you work here.”

Pacifica’s heart pounded at the girl’s touch. “I think I could probably handle a job,” she chuckled.

****

The girls plus Waddles sat on Mabel’s bed as Pacifica unpacked her bag, pulling out—as Mabel expected—a vast selection of makeup. Dipper was already out of the room, in Ford’s bedroom, where he planned to stay to give them space.

“Woah, this palette is amazing!” Mabel opened and admired an eyeshadow palette full of various colors. “How come I’ve only seen you in purple eyeshadow when you have all these colors?”

“Purple is supposed to be, like, my color, so I guess I’m too scared to branch out from it. I only really use those other colors when I’m bored at home.” She replied, taking out a zipper pouch of makeup brushes in a variety of sizes.

“Interesting...” Mabel furrowed her eyebrows. “Is it your favorite color though?”

Pacifica stared like she’d never been asked this question before. “...No, I think my favorite is blue.”

“Perfect. Do you want me to do your makeup first? I’m ready if you are.”

Her eyes widened. “Wait, we’re doing it on each other?”

Mabel giggled. “Of course, silly! Did you think we were just gonna do our own makeup? Where’s the fun in that?”

“Well, okay. I’m ready then. Are you gonna tell me what look you’re planning?”

“Absolutely not! It’s gotta be a surprise.” She inspected Pacifica’s face. “Wow, are you sure you’re not wearing makeup already? Your skin is so nice.”

“Nope. Came with a bare face like you told me, even when my mom gave me a really dirty look as I left. I am known for my good skin,” Pacifica smiled and scooted closer to the brunette.

Mabel squinted and let out an annoyed sigh. “The lighting in here is so bad. Do you by any chance have a portable vanity light or something?”

The blonde dug around her bag and pulled out just that. “I actually do.”

Mabel grabbed the light, flicked it on, and set it atop a sleeping Waddles’ back. “This should work.”

She clipped back Pacifica’s bangs with a sparkly butterfly hairclip and started with foundation and concealer (not that the girl hardly needed it). She leaned in close as she worked, making Pacifica’s heart rate speed up.

She then moved on to contour, gently cupping her face to ensure steady application. This contact made the flustered girl’s heartbeat noticable to Mabel, for it picked up even more.

“Hey, you okay?” Mabel asked, concerned but confused.

“Y-yeah. Fine. I’m fine.” Pacifica spat out, violently cursing at herself in her head.

“Hmm.” She continued, still perplexed, but aware that she wouldn’t be able to get her to talk anyway.

Mabel worked quietly for a brief moment, then proposed an idea. “I know what we’re missing. Some music! You sit tight and gimme one sec.”

She found the radio that sat on a cardboard box at the other end of the room. She didn’t use it much, but it most certainly did its job when she did. “This one doesn’t have actual radio, it just plays CD’s. I wonder what’s in there already...?”

She pressed play, and a Sev’ral Timez song started up. “Oh, perfect!” She turned up the volume and hopped back onto her bed to resume the makeover.

“I went to that concert last summer before they stopped making music. It was pretty good, but crazy with all those screaming girls,” Pacifica recalled.

“Oh, I bet. I wasn’t at the concert, but I ended up, like, raising them in secret? It was a weird day. Or days. Can’t even remember.” Mabel said nonchalantly, blending the contour along Pacifica’s cheekbone.

“Out of all the stories you and Dipper have told me about what you did last summer, I’m surprised I haven’t heard the one about you raising a famous boy band yet.”

“Speaking of...” Mabel winked. “I know you and Dipper had a romance last summer... do you still like him? Because I can  totally set up a date—“

“What? No, I don’t. I’m really glad I’m friends with him, but I don’t think I ever actually liked him like that.” Pacifica stared at her lilac nails. “I guess I got confused since he was, like, one of my first real friends, and I assumed I liked him because I confused friendship with a crush.”

Mabel blinked. She appeared relieved, but the other didn’t know why. “Oh. Well, do you like anyone else?”

The other silently thanked the music for drowning out her once again elevated heartbeat. “If I did, I wouldn’t tell you.”

“Well you’re no fun. Anyways, light blue or dark blue?” Mabel opened the eyeshadow palette she’d eyed earlier.

“Light blue.”

“Dark blue it is!” Mabel stroked a fine brush along a deep blue shade.

“What? That’s not what I said,” Pacifica frowned.

“Exactly! I wanna get you out of your comfort zone. Get you to do things you wouldn’t have done on your own and all that. Close your eyes for me,” She applied the blue to Pacifica’s eyelid.

“Well, I’ve been considering going back to my natural hair color,” Pacifica suggested.

Pacifica couldn’t see Mabel’s face, but she could hear her wide grin. “Woah, I never thought I’d hear that from you! What is it naturally? Like a brown?”

“Mhm. My mom always referred to it as ‘that pesky caramel color.’ I don’t even remember what I looked like before I was constantly getting my hair dyed.”

“Well, if you really wanna do it, I’m a phone call and a box of cheap hair dye away. But wouldn’t your parents be mad?”

“Yeah, mostly my mom... she cares the most about looks. She still ridicules me for cutting my hair, and keeps telling me I need extensions...” Pacifica was surprised about how easily these words flowed. She’d only ever talked about her parents’ harsh treatment with the other Pines twin. Both Dipper and Mabel made her more comfortable, more secure with herself. Though extremely grateful, the feeling felt alien and frightening to her.

“Paz, be honest, do your parents even know you’re here?” Mabel asked in a soft, sympathetic tone.

She drew a deep breath. “What do you think? I told them I was staying the night at a family friend’s house. I’m not allowed to have sleepovers with anyone else besides their daughter, especially not you or anyone they consider ‘commoners.’ I had to insist on riding my bike here so they wouldn’t see where I was actually going.”

After finishing the dark blue on Pacifica’s other eye, Mabel wiped off the remaining eyeshadow onto her palm, then used the same brush to pick up a slightly lighter shade.

“Did you just wipe off your brush on your hand and use it for a different color without washing it?” A bewildered Pacifica asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah? It’s quicker and easier. Also saves brushes.” Mabel applied the blue to the inner creases of Pacifica’s eyes. “Look, in all honesty, your parents sound like total doodoo faces. And I’m really sorry you have to deal with them, because you don’t deserve it. I just want you to know that me and Dipper are always here for you, and it’s not just us who cares.” Mabel set down the brush and pulled her into a hug.

She froze for a second, startled, but returned the hug. “Um... thank you.”

The girls sat in peaceful silence, Mabel humming along to the music as she finished Pacifica’s makeup.

“And... viola!” Mabel held up a handheld mirror to Pacifica, revealing the look.

“Whoa... it’s... different. But in, like, a good way,” She inspected her reflection in awe. It was a colorful look, far more colorful than what she was familiar with, but Mabel pulled it off in a way that made it look natural on her face. She looked like  herself, not like Mabel’s imprint. “I love it.”

“Yes! Mission accomplished! Your turn to do it on me!”

“Okay, prepare to be amazed.”

“Let’s see what you got, valley girl.”

****

The girls laughed and sang along to the music as Pacifica expressed her creativity on Mabel’s face. Pacifica’s approach to makeup differed from Mabel’s; she sharpened features instead of softening them, and she used just enough color to make a statement. ‘Your makeup should make you look collected, poised, and fierce,’ her mother always told her. Pacifica couldn’t help but wonder if she was expressing herself at all, or just her mother’s ideas.

“Holy heck, I look scary!” Mabel laughed as she admired the finished look in the mirror. “But the hot kinda scary. Like I could step on any man who breaks my heart.”

“Does that mean you like it?”

“Of course! I mean, I’m not sure if it’s a  _me_ kinda look, y’know? But you did really well. You’re talented.” She praised, lowering the mirror to light up a 100-watt smile at the other.

Butterflies swarmed in Pacifica’s stomach. “Th-thanks. You too. This was fun.”

“It sure was! What do you wanna do now? Wanna play a game?”

“Oh, of course! I almost forgot,” Pacifica dug into her backpack and pulled out her DS (a 3DS XL, to be exact). “You ever played on one of these?”

“Ooh, yeah! Dipper and I shared a DS when we were younger. We played on it a lot until it broke. I used to hog it to play Nintendogs.”

Pacifica beamed as she turned on the device. “Well you’ll be happy to hear that I have Nintendogs— and cats.”

Mabel gasped. “They added cats?”

“Yep! Look, this is my tabby. I named him Sir Charles,” She showed Mabel the virtual cat.

Mabel snorted. “You even give your pixelated cats a rich-sounding name.”

Pacifica tittered and rolled her eyes. “It suits him! What would  you name him anyway?”

“I personally think he looks a lot more like a Pumpkin Fluff-face, but I guess we can agree to disagree.”

And so they played Nintendogs + Cats for hours. Mabel fell asleep unintentionally and surprisingly early compared to her usual, leaving Pacifica awake, deep in thought.

She checked the time: 12:32 a.m. Dipper was probably awake, right? She needed to talk to him. She might as well find him.

Pacifica crept out the room, careful not to wake a snoring Mabel. She knew Dipper’s whereabouts: Ford’s room. But what she didn’t know was the actual location of it in the shack. She struggled as she explored, for she didn’t want to open any unknown doors in fear she’d stumble into Stan’s room, or anywhere else she shouldn’t be. To her luck, the door to Ford’s room was cracked open, emitting enough light to catch her attention. She heard Dipper and Ford’s voices as she approached.

She didn’t want to just walk in, and knocking felt odd, so she simply cleared her throat loudly as she stood outside the room.

“Is someone out there?” Ford questioned.

“Probably Mabel. Lemme see.”

She waited for Dipper. When he opened the door wider, already starting to walk out into the hall, he jumped at the sight of Pacifica awkwardly standing in front of him.

“Yeesh, you could’ve knocked. Do you need something, or...?”

Pacifica glanced at Ford, who gazed at her curiously from inside the room, sitting next to a DD&MD board and countless sheets of graph paper. “Yeah, um, sorry to interrupt, I was just hoping I could talk to you about something. Mabel’s asleep.”

“Asleep before 2 a.m. at a sleepover? That’s weird. Well, sorry, but you interrupted a game of DD&MD, which is inexcusable regardless of the circumstances. You’ll have to wait until the morning.”

She crossed her arms at the boy and gave him a piercing glare.

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding...” Dipper  turned around to face Ford. “Can we pause for a few minutes?”

“Actually, Dipper, I was going to suggest we finish up for the night pretty soon anyways. You go talk to Pacifica, I’ll clean up,” Ford nodded to him.

“Dude, you gotta let me clean up next time, but thanks. Okay, Pacifica, did you wanna go somewhere, or...?”

Pacifica led him to the open room in the attic, where she hoped would have the most privacy. They sat down at the window seat, and Pacifica gulped, then stared at her nails.

“I like your makeup. I’m assuming it’s Mabel’s work?”

She nodded.

“You gonna talk, or...?”

A frustrated huff escaped her lips. “I’m... trying to gather the words, okay? It’s about Mabel, obviously. And it’s something I can’t tell her. It has to be you.”

Dipper started to put the hints together. He had a good idea of what was happening now, but wanted Pacifica to say it on her own accord. “I promise I’ll understand.”

She exhaled slowly. “...I havea crush on Mabel.”

Dipper nodded, moreso to himself than the girl. “I know.”

Her breath hitched. “Wh-what? Is it that obvious?”

He placed a hand on her shoulder. “Hey, it’s okay. Mabel’s completely clueless. And you’re not alone in this, I like boys, too.”

Pacifica blinked away the tears in her eyes. “Wait, really? You’re bisexual?”

He nodded and smiled. “I realized earlier this year. I hadn’t planned on telling you like this, but I figured it would be reassuring. Have you known you were for awhile, or...?”

She shook her head. “Oh, I’m not bi. I think I’m a les... that. Yeah. I don’t think I’ve ever actually liked a boy.” 

Dipper stopped to think. “So, last summer, I totally misinterpreted our interactions...?”

“Y-yeah. Sorry. I honestly thought I liked you, but turns out I was just forcing it on myself because I thought I was supposed to. I think you having Mabel’s face confused me, too.”

“So... you liked her last summer, too?”

Pacifica threw up her hands in dismay. “I guess? Maybe? I don’t know. This is all so weird and confusing...” She sighed. “Be honest, do you think there’s any chance that she likes girls, too? Specifically me?”

Dipper, of course, knew the exact answer to this question. How could they both be so oblivious? He considered telling Pacifica the complete truth:  _yes, my sister is a raging pansexual and she’s known for years, and she’s probably fully aware of her crush on you._ But if he told her this, would she try to make a move on an unsuspecting Mabel? And even if Mabel was aware of her feelings, she may not be ready to face them and she could react irrationally, sending the wrong idea to Pacifica, and everything would collapse. But if he were to shut down the truth completely, he would discourage Pacifica and she’d feel worse. He needed to find a middle ground.

“I can’t confidently say she’s in love with you or anything like that, but I definitely think there’s a chance, Pacifica. I don’t want you to keep stressing over this. I know how hard it is to get over the confusion, but just know that you can talk to me whenever. Wendy’s bi, too, if you wanted to talk to a girl about it. You’re not alone.”

Pacifica sniffed and pulled Dipper into a tight hug. “Thank you so much.”

“Of course. I’m really glad you interrupted my DD&MD campaign.”

****

Mabel awoke around a half hour later, and turned to see Pacifica sleeping soundly on Dipper’s bed. She realized she still had the makeup on from before, but she couldn’t bring herself to get up and wipe it off. She turned to her other side and rested her hand on Waddles, now the little spoon.

Thoughts raced through her head: _ I can’t risk making a move on her, she probably would hate me after. There’s no way she likes me back. She’s straight, obviously. I can’t ruin this blooming friendship with my dumb feelings. Should I talk to Dipper about it? Wendy? No, of course not, if I talk about it I’ll only make it worse. I have to just shove these feelings down and act like they’re not there. That works, right? _

Mabel shut her eyes, desperately trying to fall back asleep.


	5. the abominable bro-man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the pines plus soos and melody take a camping trip so they can hunt a local cryptid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gah i dont like this as much as i hoped to when i started writing this but i had a block for like a week and had to finish the chapter. i should hopefully be back on my groove now. also in this chap it mentions how dipper and mabel are done with 8th grade, and im not entirely sure if thats correct? i mean in the show they turn 13 at the end of the summer and it’s stated that they have one more year before high school, and since 7th graders usually turn 13 before 8th grade starts i just kinda assumed. idk it makes sense to me so :)

“Dudes! You gotta check out this article!” Soos smacked a newspaper onto the gift shop counter. Melody stood at the cash register, sorting it, but paying attention to the conversation.

Dipper read the headline aloud. “ _‘Gravity Peaks Park to Go Out of Business?’_ Isn’t that the camping site up in the mountains?”

“Keep reading, dawg, it gets weird.”

Mabel read in Dipper’s place. “ _‘Sightings of an apparent yeti in cargo shorts have led to scared campers fleeing the grounds. To our knowledge, no one has been injured, but this is still considered a threat. Manager and owner of the park, Bartholomew Barnes’_ —that’s gotta be one of the funniest names I’ve ever heard— _‘requested his phone number to be in this article in case someone wished to assist him with his problem.’_ And there’s his phone number.”

Dipper rubbed his temples. “Wait a minute... a yeti in cargo shorts in the nearby peaks? That’s gotta be the Abominable Bro-Man! Ford’s encountered it before.”

“Soos contacted this Bartholomew guy and turns out he’s willing to pay whoever can deal with the problem for him,” Melody picked up. “So we thought, let’s try it! Let’s spend a night camping out there and see if we can face this Chad-yeti.”

Soos smiled at his girlfriend and then turned to face the kids again. “But I was like, wait, what if only two people isn’t enough to do the job? We need reinforcements! Two thirteen-year-olds, specifically. I’m talking about you dudes.”

Dipper and Mabel shared a look of excitement. Dipper spoke for them. “We’d love to join! We may need to buy tents and stuff, though. When did you plan on going?

“We can wait until this weekend if necessary, but we were planning on closing the shack early today and heading out tonight. It’s a little less than an hour drive over there. We were probably gonna leave at 4:00.” Melody answered.

“Melody, dude, I am so glad you’re good at planning, because I totally forgot all the details until you said them just now.” Soos placed his hand on her shoulder.

“I bet we could go today! We just need to talk with the ol’ Stans about it and get supplies.” Mabel stated with a brace-filled smile.

And just like that, Ford walked in and joined the conversation. “Were you kids talking about the sightings of the Abominable Bro-man?”

Dipper spoke fast in his eagerness. “Yeah! Can Mabel and I go camping with Soos and Melody tonight up in Gravity Peaks to investigate?”

Ford’s face appeared stern. “Kids, that’s a dangerous mission that would be irresponsible for me to let you go on as your guardian...” A smile grew on his face. “...without someone experienced like me coming along, too! How’s about we go out and buy a nice tent and any other supplies we’ll need?”

“Yes, thank you!” The kids ran up and hugged Ford.

When they pulled away, Stan stood in the room, too. “I heard whatever you’re doing involves money, and I want in.”

“We’re gonna go camping and hunt a Chad-yeti, dawg.” Soos informed Stan.

“Woah woah woah, camping? Ugh, I  _hate_ camping. Reminds me too much of when I was homeless. I mean, who voluntarily sleeps in a bag out in the woods? Buncha granola freaks, that’s who.” Stan crossed his arms.

Ford frowned at him. “Come on, Stanley, the entire rest of your family is going, why should you just stay here? What would you even do here alone while we’re out hunting a monster? Binge-watch British period dramas?”

Stan wagged a finger at his brother. “I’ll have you know, those movies are very entertaining and I’d be perfectly content watching them all night instead of going on some ‘epic monster-hunting trip.’ But fine. I’ll come along, but only—and I mean  _only_ —if we buy one of those obnoxiously large tents meant to sleep, like, twenty people. I’m not settlin’ with anything less. I usually try to spare every expense, but this is a special case.”

The younger twins made eye contact, their brown eyes each fiery with a glint of enthusiasm. “S’mores!” They blurted simultaneously.

Stan adjusted his hearing aid. “Did you kids just say whor—“ Ford stopped him by elbowing his rib. “Ow! That was a serious question!”

“S’mores, Grunkle Stan! Can we make s’mores tonight once we set up camp?” Mabel pleaded.

“Oh, uh, sure kid. Lemme check if we already have the stuff before we go out and buy it,” Stan left to go search the kitchen.

“Hmm, what should we do for dinner? We’ll have to pack something to eat later,” Ford thought aloud.

“Yo, dude, we got it covered. Melody was gonna make some sandwiches, and then pack chips, and bring a cooler. She’s like, a mom. Okay, that’s a weird thing to say since she’s my girlfriend, but you get it, dawg.”

“Well, that settles it, then. You two can handle dinner and the drinks, and we’ll go buy ingredients for s’mores while we’re out shopping for everything else,” Ford concluded, adjusting his glasses.

Dipper pointed in the direction of the kitchen. “Wasn’t Stan checking to see if we have the ingredients? If we already do, we don’t need to worry.”

“In all honesty, my boy, since all our food dated any more than three years old was thrown out, I highly doubt we have those ingredients.”

****

And, of course, they didn’t have the ingredients. The four Pines set out to shop. Ford had to stop Stan from pushing the kids in the shopping cart at top speed multiple times. Sometimes the man felt like the only actual guardian in the family.

Stan picked out an especially large tent and insisted on buying a memory foam mattress ‘for his back.’ The others settled with padded sleeping bags. They also purchased supplies to set up a trap for the Abominable Bro-man, including a tripwire and a net; Ford didn’t think it was entirely necessary, but he and Stan agreed on the extra safety measure, considering last summer’s events.

They began to pack Stan’s car once they arrived home. This didn’t take long, since they only fit what they could, considering the minimal space available with all four Pines in the car.

“I’m so excited!” Mabel exclaimed as she shoved clothes into an overnight bag. “A camping trip with Soos, Melody, my bro and my grunkles... I hadn’t expected something so awesome within the first week we were here!”

“You remember why we’re going, right?” Dipper gathered clothes to pack. “We’re hunting a literal monster. It could eat us, for all we know.”

“Well, if we die, at least we’ll die together!” Mabel pumped her fist upward.

“Fair enough.”

“Kids!” Stan shouted from downstairs, “To our luck, the bathrooms at this place have some showers. So if ya wanna use em’, pack shampoo and all’at.”

“Ooh, fancy! Do you think they’ll be clean?” Mabel asked her brother.

“Mabel, since when is any public restroom clean?”

Soos and Melody closed and left the shack at 3:00, and returned, packed and ready, close to 3:45. Luckily, there was enough extra room in Soos’ truck to fit the remaining supplies. Before their departure, Mabel called Grenda and gave her instructions to petsit Waddles while they were gone. As much as she wished to bring the pig along, she didn’t want to risk him being hurt by the Abominable Bro-man.

Soos led the caravan in his pickup truck with Melody, Stan behind, driving the Pines. The elder twins recounted stories from their adventures to the younger to pass time.

“Wow, I hope Mabel and I can go out and do stuff like that someday.” Dipper smiled at the thought.

“Of course we can! You say that like it’s some impossible dream,” Mabel replied, throwing a punch at Dipper’s upper arm.

“Mabel’s got a point, kid. All ya need is a budget and a vehicle, whether it’s a boat like me n’ Sixer used, or an RV or somethin’, and you’re pretty much set. It’s really more simple than it seems,” Stan smiled fondly at his brother in the front passenger seat.

Ford returned the smile. “And don’t wait until you’re at our old age, just do it whenever you please.”

“We will.”

****

Mabel stretched her legs after stepping out the car when they arrived at the campsite. “Okay, first order of business, where the heck is the bathroom? I chugged a bunch of Mabel Juice before we left and I’ve been holding it for most of that car ride.”

Melody patted Mabel’s shoulder. “It should be super close, Soos parked near it so we could set up camp next to it, per Stan’s request. Here, I’ll walk you over while the boys start to unpack and set up.”

“Making the men do the work, I like your style, sista!” They walked off.

“Hey, Dip, can you help me with some of this stuff?” Soos asked as he started to unload his truck.

“Sure, man.”

“You two work on that, me n’ Poindexter will focus on this,” Stan grabbed one of the overnight bags from his nearly-empty car.

“Stanley, we barely packed anything in here.”

“Shush. That’s the point.”

With their joint work in addition to Mabel and Melody’s once they returned, they unloaded and set up camp reasonably quickly. By then, they weren’t entirely sure what to do, since it was too early for dinner and they hadn’t planned much, only the vague ‘hunt the monster.’

“Should we explore the site and see if we can find the Abominable Bro-man?” Dipper suggested. “We could split up to cover more ground.”

“Split up? We’ve all seen horror movies, that’s a bad idea that would get someone killed. We all move together or we stay here.” Stan affirmed.

“Since when do you care so much about our safety?” Mabel tilted her head.

“Since you kids almost died last summer, sweetie. I’m not takin’ any chances.”

“Dude, just don’t let the kids go alone. Each of them can have a euthanizer to make sure they’re safe.” Soos argued confidently.

“Do you mean a supervisor, honey?” Melody placed a hand on his arm.

“You know me so well,” Soos placed his hand atop hers.

“No offence, Soos, but I think your girlfriend needs to be  your supervisor. But, yeah, sure, I s’pose I could go with one of the kids and Ford can go with the other.”

“Ooh! Stan! We should prank the Abominable Bro-man! What if we threw glitter on him? I have some with me right now! Is that a good prank?” Mabel rushed up to her uncle frantically.

“Please, if you come across it, don’t provoke it. Try not to be seen and just observe from a distance and remember where you found it. If we do end up needing to trap or attack it, it would be most effective as a group effort,” Ford said, simultaneously stern and concerned.

“Don’t worry, Sixer, I can keep this little rascal—“ Stan ruffled Mabel’s hair. “—out of trouble. Mostly. Onwards, Mabel!”

Melody stopped them. “Hey, take this map of the park. Don’t wanna risk you getting lost.”

“Oh, good thinkin’, toots, thanks,” Stan took the map. “Let’s all meet back here in a half hour or so. Okay,  _now_ onwards, Mabel!”

Ford turned to Dipper. “Well, let’s leave the couple be and set out. Which way would you like to go?”

Dipper scanned the surrounding area. “Hmm... did you have more of those maps, Melody?”

“Of course,” she handed one over to him.

Dipper pointed at a body of water on the map labelled ‘Shadow Pond.’ “How about there?”

Ford examined the map. “Sure, Dipper! Let’s go, then. See you in a half hour!” Ford waved to Soos and Melody as they departed. The couple left to take a more scenic route, toward the cliffs of the peak.

****

“So, what’s this thing look like, anyway?” Stan asked, scanning his line of sight as he walked through the woods with Mabel.

“Oh, did you not see Ford’s drawing? Imagine your standard yeti with the clothes of a college boy who disrespects women.”

“Yeesh, just when I thought this town couldn’t get any weirder.”

“I’ve learned to expect the worst!” A cheerful Mabel skipped along the path.

They followed the path until it ended in front of a deeper part of the forest, then stopped to study the map. “I think the map cuts off right where this path ends, which probably means they don’t want people goin’ further into these woods. Which is exactly why we should keep going!”

Mabel toyed with the end of her sleeve. “I don’t know, Stan... if it’s not on the map we could totally lose our direction. And we’re kinda the most likely to get lost out of all the groups...”

“Did’ja forget the time Soos got lost in that corn maze?”

“Well, he has Melody with him so it cancels out.”

He grunted in agreement. “I guess that makes sense. I s’pose if no one’s here anyway then this yeti guy wouldn’t feel the need to hide all deep in the woods. We’ll go a different way.”

****

“I just realized, like, this would’ve been a totally romantic trip if I hadn’t invited the Pines,” Soos rubbed his elbow as he walked alongside Melody. “Sorry, dude.”

“Hey, don’t worry about that, I’m glad you invited them. I mean, you hadn’t seen them all year. And they keep good company,” Melody grasped his hand. “Plus, summer just started. We’ll have plenty of chances for that. Maybe we can come back here when the whole monster threat is taken care of.”

Soos laughed. “I don’t know, I think monster hunting is pretty romantic. That’s how our first date went. Kinda.”

“Heh, maybe it is.” Melody ran up to the railing at the edge of the cliff. “Woah, look at this view!”

The view was similar to that of Lookout Point within the town, but further away and higher. The town looked incredibly small and insignificant, which Soos found to be enticing, but strange. “It’s scary, dude.”

Melody drummed her fingers on the railing. “The height?”

“No, seeing the town like this. It looks so small, like I could fit it in my pocket. You’d never guess that the apocalypse happened here less than a year ago,” He turned around. “Welp! Back to looking for the Chad-yeti. Race you to that tree!”

“I’m gonna beat you!” Melody laughed.

She did, and she froze upon reaching the tree, staring straight ahead. “Soos,” She whispered. “Look.”

Soos caught up and gaped at the sight. There he stood, the Abominable Bro-man, out basically in the open, in his respective cargo shorts in addition to a tank top, a backwards baseball cap, and a pair of sunglasses tilted up and resting on his forehead. He stared straight at the couple, still. “What do you think it’s doing?” Soos whispered.

“I don’t know, sizing us up maybe? What should we do?”

“Suh dude?”

Soos and Melody exchanged a wide-eyed look.

“What, you aren’t gonna say hi? That’s, like, totally rude, bro.” The Bro-man shook his head.

“Um... hi?” Soos greeted him awkwardly.

“You two havin’ a chill sesh out here? Dope. Haven’t seen too many dudes out here recently, don’t know why. Which makes zero sense, ‘cause everyone loves me!”

“If you mean camping, then yes,” Melody cleared her throat.

“Whoa, hey babe. You’re a real hottie, you know that? I’m like, not talking to any girls right now, so...” The Bro-man approached an uneasy Melody.

Soos started to step in front of Melody, but she stopped him and gave him a look and a nod that said “I can handle this.”

“Not interested, buddy. I’m offended that you’d even think I’d leave my boyfriend here from some yeti that smells like  Axe .”

The Bro-man let out an annoying laugh. “Damn, fiesty. Smell ya later, I guess.” He stalked off into the forest.

The couple turned to face each other again.

“Okay, what the hell? I didn’t think this thing would actually be  intelligent . Or, as intelligent as a frat boy can be,” Melody crossed her arms. 

“Dude, me neither. I never thought I’d see a yeti try to flirt with my girlfriend. Bigfoot, maybe, but a yeti? Hadn’t thought of that one,” Soos scratched his chin.

Melody unfolded her map and inspected it. “We should head back, especially while he doesn’t know where we’re going. I don’t want that thing following us.”

“Agreed.”

****

“Oh. That’s why it’s called Shadow Pond,” Dipper stood with Ford, in front of a large pond with unnaturally dark water.

“That’s strange. What could be in this water that makes it like this? It looks like when you mix black paint with water,” Ford knelt down, squinting at the odd water.

Dipper sat down cross-legged next to his uncle. “Do you think it’s safe?”

Ford pulled a notepad out of his coat pocket and jotted a couple quick notes. “I’m unsure, but it’s best we leave it be for now. Perhaps I’ll come back to investigate another time. But since this isn’t part of the mission and there’s no sign of the Bro-man, we should probably change course.”

Dipper checked his watch. “Oh, we spent awhile walking. We should probably go back.”

“Hmm, alright, perhaps one of the other groups found a hint. Come along, then.”

They returned to their setup to see Soos and Melody. Soos was starting up the campfire as Melody sat on one of the log chairs surrounding it.

“Oh, good, you’re back. We had a run-in with the Bro-man,” Melody informed as Ford and Dipper took a seat on the log.

“What? Was it hostile?” Ford asked.

“Dude, it didn’t hurt us, but you didn’t tell us that thing could talk,” Soos lit a match.

“Oh, well, yes, I’ve heard it say a couple short words and phrases—“

Melody interrupted him. “No, it can  _talk_ talk. Actual sentences. He even flirted with me.”

Everyone looked to Ford, expecting a sort of explanation. The man simply appeared befuddled. “That’s—peculiar. Extremely peculiar. I suppose it has been awhile since I last saw this creature, and since then he could’ve spent more time around people and picked up their language. Well, specifically fraternity kids.”

“Are we gonna have to, like, kill him? It seems inhumane considering he’s basically a person,” Dipper stared into the small fire.

“I never intended to do that in the first place, but we’ll definitely need to rethink our approach. But let’s worry about that later, I’m famished.”

Mabel and Stan returned shortly after, and the group ate their dinner.

They drank Pitt Cola around the fire as they laughed and told stories. But as the sun set and the night noises of bats and howling wolves filled the air, everyone silently wondered how they were going to handle the Bro-man situation.

“Mkay, so we’re only gettin’ paid if we get rid of this yeti, so even if he seems harmless, we gotta do somethin.’” Stan turned his head and spit out the pit from his soda.

“But he’s a person! Isn’t there another way?” Mabel protested.

“Kid, a yeti can’t be a person, especially not one that says ‘chill sesh.’”

“Well, Mabel, we could try talking with him and figure out why he’s been scaring away campers. But I wouldn’t rely on just talking it out. He’s still a monster.” Ford weighed in.

“We could try it, but he’s  annoying . He might not even cooperate.” Melody sighed.

“Well, dudes, how about we just wait it out. We don’t need some mega-complicated plan. We’ll figure it out. Plus, I wanna make s’mores.” Soos pulled out the s’mores ingredients from the tote bag next to him.

“I respect your priorities, Soos!” Mabel ran over to him. “Do you have any pointy roasty sticks or do we need to get some?”

Soos reached into the bag again and pulled out six roasting sticks. “Way ahead of you, hambone.”

Mabel grabbed one and stuck a marshmallow on it. “Woah, they’re the extendable kind!”

Everyone collected their sticks and began to roast their marshmallows. Stan immediately stuck his directly in the fire and watched the marshmallow blacken.

Ford watched him, disgusted. “Do you seriously like it so burnt?”

“Uh, yeah, it’s delicious. Perfect mix of crispy and gooey. Not everyone slowly turns it for a half hour till it’s golden like you.”

“I do that,” Dipper objected.

“‘Course you do.”

Soos and Melody followed their own method, in which they held the marshmallow just close enough to the fire so it burnt slightly, letting it turn brown at the ends. They appeared deep in thought, extremely careful not to let the marshmallow too close. Mabel, alternatively, carelessly swung the stick back and forth through the fire, quick enough not to let the marshmallow burn.

Stan prepared his s’more and turned back toward the fire. “Mabel, sweetie, I hate to ruin your fun, but watch where you’re swingin’ that thing. Don’t wanna launch a burning glob of sugar at Soos.”

Mabel pouted, but obeyed, and held the marshmallow steady above the flame. “Fair enough, I guess. Also, Soos, Melody, do you like milk or dark chocolate better? Stan and I are trying to prove the point that Dip and Ford are the only ones who like dark. We only bought both because they forced us to.”

“Milk,” The couple answered in unison.

Stan laughed as he wiped marshmallow goo off his chin. “I knew it! Milk is better, and we have majority vote to prove it.”

Ford scoffed. “This is a small sample size! You people are so weird. I mean, from Mabel I expect, because we all know she loves sweet things, but for the rest of you, seriously? I can’t eat two bites of a milk chocolate bar without getting that gross sensation on my tongue. It’s far too sweet. The best chocolate is perfectly bittersweet.”

“Dark chocolate makes me crazy thirsty, dawg,” Soos stared intently at his marshmallow, still roasting it. “I don’t hate it, I just like milk better.”

“I eat both,” Melody stated casually. “But in this instance where I have to pick, I pick milk.”

Dipper and Ford shook their heads at one another. “They just don’t get us, Grunkle Ford,” Dipper sighed.

Mabel settled on taking after Stan’s example and just straight-up burning her marshmallow. Soon after, the others prepared their s’mores and ate. Everyone made at least two as time went on, unable to get enough of the sweet chocolatey goodness. The moon rose now, the only light emitting from the fire and distant lampposts.

The lack of light, of course, prevented the group from seeing the Abominable Bro-man walk right up to them.

“ _Brooooo_ , you guys are making s’mores? I want in!”

Everyone collectively jumped and made noises in their fear. 

Dipper leaned closed to Ford and whispered. “What do we do?!”

Ford glanced at the others and back at the Bro-man. He awkwardly cleared his throat. “Ahem—um, Soos, give him a stick and a marshmallow.”

Soos raised an eyebrow but complied, preparing a stick for the Bro-man and passing it to him. The others watched, silent and bewildered.

The Bro-man sat down next to the fire, in rather uncomfortable proximity to the others, especially due to his sheer size. “You guys are totally nice. Every time I try to talk to other campers they run away screaming. All I want is some food, bro!”

“Is that all you’ve been doin’? Just tryna join in?” Stan scratched his neck.

“Yeah dude, I thought people would let me chill with them like my friends did, but everyone’s totally scared of me because I’m a yeti or whatever.”

Ford looked the most lost out of everyone. “You had human friends? I thought you ate people.”

The Bro-man waved his hand dismissively. “Bro,  used to . Don’t bring up my past, totally not cool. I realized that human food tastes so much better than eating humans  as food, so I just started sharing with them. Or stealing if they didn’t like me.”

“So, in the time you spent hanging our with your ‘friends’, you picked up their language and mannerisms?” Dipper asked.

“I have no clue what that last word means, but yeah, I can talk like a person now.”

Soos stroked his chin. “So, like, we’re supposed to get rid of you in order for this park to be popular again. You scared away too many campers, dawg, whether you meant to or not.”

The Bro-man pulled the burning marshmallow out of the fire, watching the flames engulf it. “Totally their fault, not mine. They should’ve given me a chance, bro.”

“Can’t we just tell the owner that the people should be nice to him and everything will be fine?” Mabel gestured toward the Bro-man, speaking quieter.

Melody took the responsibility of turning down her naive idea. “I hate to be the one to say it, Mabel, but I don’t think they’re gonna listen to that. Most people don’t wanna befriend a strange creature twice their size.”

Dipper stroked his chin. “Most people, yeah, but what about the minority?”

“What are you dorks whispering about?” The Bro-man blew out a the flame on his marshmallow. “Also, I’m ready to make my s’more.”

Soos passed him chocolate and graham crackers.

“Those friends you had, they were all frat boys, right?” Dipper asked.

“Uh, duh, of course. Best people ever. I practically go to RCU.”

Ford opened his mouth to speak, then turned away and fidgeted with his hands in thought.

“Uh oh. That’s your thinking face, Brainiac.” Stan inspected him.

“Yes, I’m...” Ford turned to face the Bro-man. “When was the last time your friends went camping here?”

“Just a couple days ago. They still come all the time.”

Ford nodded. “So... what if you promised to leave all other campers alone, and the only ones you came in contact with were your friends?”

“Bro, if I couldn’t steal food from other campers then I’d starve. What would I even eat?  Berries? ” The Bro-man scoffed.

“What if they gave you extra food to save when they’re not around?” Dipper suggested.

Mabel gasped. “Ooh! Ooh! That’s a good idea! We can email the frat house telling them to bring extra food for the AB each time they visit, and tell everyone else that he’s gone so they can come back!”

“Those kids have so much of their parents’ money that they have to agree to spend it on food for him!” Stan exclaimed.

“Righteous!” The Abominable Bro-man pumped his fist. “Well, I’ll be heading out. Catch you on the flip side!” He walked off, biting into his s’more.

The six sat in silence for a moment.

“That was... anticlimactic. And surprisingly easy.” Dipper stated.

“Not gonna lie, I’m glad we got the easy way out, but I was also real excited to catch that guy in a net,” Stan rolled his eyes.

“Well, let’s hold on to it. The summer just started, we’ll probably need it sooner or later,” Soos weighed in.

Melody stood up. “Okay, well, I feel super gross, so I’m gonna go hit the shower.” She gave Soos a kiss on the cheek then went into their tent to retrieve her clothes and toiletries.

Stan yawned. “What time is it? I’m gettin’ tired.”

Dipper checked his watch and snorted. “It’s only 9:00, old man.”

Ford chuckled. “How are you even tired, Stanley? You barely did anything.”

Stan raised his palms. “Oh, everyone bully the poor old man. I saved the world, y’know.”

Soos counted his fingers. “Stan, I’ve been keeping count, and that’s the one hundred and twenty-seventh time you’ve said that.”

“And that’s only when you were around to hear it,” Dipper laughed.

****

After Melody returned from her shower, Mabel followed suit, then Ford. There were multiple showers, but because of the limited hot water, they decided to space it out. The others stayed by the fire, each pair recounting stories of their past nine months: Mabel and Dipper telling tales of eighth grade, Stan and Ford their adventures at sea, Soos and Melody and the antics at the Mystery Shack.

“Shower’s open, if anyone else would like to use it,” Ford said as he returned, putting away his clothes in the tent.

“Aren’t you gonna shower, Stan?” Mabel asked.

“Yeesh, no way, kid. I’m no germo-phone, or whatever—“

“Germophobe, Stanley.”

“Yeah, yeah. But I draw the line at using something that’s had multiple peoples’ naked or almost naked bodies in it. A public shower is just like the pool or the bus.”

Dipper frowned. “But people are clothed on the bus.”

“Not always. I’ve been places, kid.”

Soos stood up. “Well, I think now’s a good time to get ready for bed. Imma put out this fire, if that’s okay with you dudes.”

The others nodded, and then headed off to the bathroom to brush their teeth and wash their faces. Shortly after, everyone settled into their tents for the night.

The grunkles snored softly from the other end of the tent, leaving Dipper and Mabel speaking in hushed voices as they played a card game, sitting up on their sleeping bags.

“Yes! Ace of spades! I win!” Mabel dramatically slapped her card down.

“Ugh. You’re not playing this right.”

“I make up my own rules!”

Dipper started to gather and neatly stack the cards. “Mkay, I’m putting this away now.”

Mabel tapped her knee. “I’m not tired yet. You wanna stargaze?”

Dipper smiled. “Yeah, of course... I wouldn’t have expected you to suggest that.”

Mabel unzipped the tent and stepped out. “Eh, I may not have, like, every constellation memorized like you or Ford, but I still think stars are pretty.”

“That’s fair.” Dipper followed her out.

They spread out a picnic blanket outside the tent and laid on it. Mabel pointed to a star. “What’s that star?”

“That should be Mars, actually.”

“Ooh! Ooh! Show me your constellation!”

“Okay, point up and I’ll guide your hand.”

Dipper moved Mabel’s hand to point at the Big Dipper.

“I never understood why people made fun of your birthmark. I’ve always thought it was, like, the coolest thing ever.”

Dipper huffed a short laugh. “What, you think they were jealous or something?”

“Maybe. I would be—well, not ‘would be,’ I am!”

Dipper thought for a moment. “Hey, we’ve been here almost a week now, any summer romances brewing for you?”

Mabel laughed nervously. “Psh, what? No way I would’ve got a partner within the first week.”

“You did last summer.”

“Okay, true, but that’s also when I was mega boy crazy. I’m pretty much over that phase. I’m not throwing myself at every person my age that I’m attracted to.”

Dipper doubted he could get her to talk about Pacifica, but he didn’t want to give up just yet. “So there’s no one you might be catching feelings for?”

Mabel forced a laugh. “Ha! No. No, there isn’t.”

As they stargazed in silence, Dipper thought of how he could get the two girls to finally fess up. He realized he’d had to play Mabel’s own game—matchmaking. And he couldn’t do it alone.


	6. turtlenecks at gravity malls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the pines plus friends go on a shopping trip, and set out to buy something for ford, who couldn’t come due to other plans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this isnt as long or entertaining of a chapter as i initially planned but regardless i hope you can enjoy some fun mall shenanigans. havent entirely planned next chap yet but it should be more eventful

“Alright, kids. Shack’s closed, it’s a Friday, where d’ya wanna go?” Stan plopped onto his recliner after finishing unpacking from their camping trip the previous day.

Mabel, sat at the table with Dipper, tapped her lips in thought. “Ooh! How about the mall?”

“Eh, sure. Was actually wantin’ to get more gold chains. Man’s gotta be accessorized, y’know.”

“Can we get lunch at the food court?” Dipper asked. “Soos says there’s this really good ice cream place that just opened up there.”

“Ya had me at ice cream, kid.”

Mabel promptly invited Candy, Wendy, Grenda, and Pacifica via phone to come along. While she did this, Dipper invited Ford.

“Sorry, Dipper, but I’ve already made plans to help out Fiddleford today. I’m not quite the shopping type anyway,” He placed a hand on his nephew’s shoulder.

Mabel entered the room. “Hm. Well if you’re not coming then we’re gonna buy you something!”

“What? You don’t need to do that, Mabel.”

“Of course we do! What’s something you’ve been wanting to buy? And not something lame, like, a new pack of pens or whatever it is that you spend money on.”

Ford stroked his chin. “Well, I have been considering buying another turtleneck. Perhaps in a different color.”

Mabel hopped in excitement and threw a few punches at Dipper’s shoulder. “Yes! I won’t lie, you do rock that look—“ She gestured towards the signature maroon turtleneck Ford wore. “—but it’s about time you branch out. Leave it to me and Dipper! Well, mostly me, but he’ll still get credit for some of it.”

The three arrived at the mall shortly after. Stan handed Dipper a twenty dollar bill. “This is for lunch. Imma go off and start buyin’ gold, but I’ll be at the food court in a half hour or so, so we can meet up there. See ya kids in a bit.”

“Wait, why are you giving Dipper the money?” Mabel crossed her arms.

“Sweetie, Dipper has an actual wallet. You would’ve just shoved that bill up your sleeve.”

“I swear, you know me better than I know myself. Catch you at the food court!” They exchanged a wave and Stan strided off.

Dipper looked around. “Where did you say we were meeting up with the girls? They might be here already.”

“Oh! Yeah! By the Meat Cute stand. Let’s go.”

Once at the stand, they found the girls waiting for them.

_“Eee!”_ Mabel ran up to the group. “You guys are all here! This is gonna be  _so_ fun.”

Pacifica smiled. “I never miss a shopping trip.”

“You need to try Scoop Coop, the new ice cream place,” Candy said. “The flavors are crazy weird, but still manage to be good.”

“Already planning on it!” Mabel scanned the surrounding area. “First order of business, me and my broseph are gonna find a snazzy turtleneck gift for Ford. Anyone know what shops we should hit first?”

Pacifica raised her index finger. “Oh! I know the perfect place, it’s at the south end of the mall—“

“Pacifica, it’s not one of those high-end stores you shop at, is it? We have a budget.” Dipper cut her off.

“Oh,” Pacifica coughed. “Yeah. Sorry. Forgot.”

Mabel patted the blonde’s arm. “Thanks anyway! I actually just thought of somewhere we can look. Let’s go, ladies! And Dipper!”

Mabel brainstormed to Dipper as they made their way to the store, the girls following behind. “Alright, bro-bro, what are we thinking for ol’ Fordsie? He likes darker colors, but I think a pastel would suit him...”

“Mabel, you’re asking the wrong person. I’m not all fashion-inclined like you.”

“You’re right. You only started properly matching your outfits without my help, like, two months ago.”

“Hey—“

“Pacifica!” Mabel paused so that the other girl would catch up to her. “You and I are on the same fashion-wavelength. What color should Ford’s new turtleneck be?”

Dipper silently celebrated. A small effort, but the girls were talking alone.

“Hmm... you said he usually wears dark colors, right?” She asked.

“Yep. Shades of beige. Black. Maroon. Getting another dark color would be a safe choice, but also I want him to make a statement, y’know? I want him to try something new.”

“I totally get it.” Pacifica pushed open the door to the store: Threads for Old Men.

“Huh. That’s weirdly perfect,” Wendy observed as she walked in.

Mabel spun around and spoke to the rest of the group. “Alright, everyone! First order of business is to find the turtlenecks. Let’s split up and get moving!”

Wendy split off with Dipper. “I swear, your sister takes fashion so seriously, it could be her career.”

Dipper scanned a wall of sweater-vests. “Yep, becoming a fashion designer is one of her biggest goals. Especially for animals. She’s knitted more clothes for Waddles than I have in my closet.”

Wendy snorted. “She should give him a fashion show.”

“Oh, god, don’t let her hear that idea.”

A few moments later, Grenda’s naturally projecting voice announced that she and Candy found the turtlenecks. The group congregated again, examining the selection.

“Some of these have text on them,” Candy pulled a turtleneck off the rack that read ‘Mentally In My 30’s.’

“Yikes. Definitely not for Ford. Unless it were Stan getting it for him as some sort of joke.” Mabel skimmed through the rack.

Wendy did a head count. “Wait. Where’d Grenda go?”

As if on cue, Grenda emerged from the nearby dressing room in a long-sleeve button-up shirt underneath a sweater vest, tucked into loose beige pants. “Look, everyone! Old person cosplay!”

Candy giggled and started grabbing clothes near her. “Ooh! My turn!” She ran into the dressing room.

“Hey, Mabel!” Pacifica called. “How about this?”

Mabel gasped upon seeing the green turtleneck she held. “Forest green! Of course! That’s the same color I used to make his apron!”

Wendy pulled out another turtleneck. “Hey, this one could work, too.”

Mabel inspected the other option: the same exact sweater, but baby blue. “Oh no, they’re both great! I’m torn! Dipper, you know Ford the best, what do you think suits him more?”

Dipper looked back and forth between the sweaters. “I’m...not sure. I mean, they both work. I guess maybe the blue?”

“I’m kinda leaning toward the green, but maybe I’m biased since that’s my favorite color,” Wendy shrugged. “It’s up to you, Mabel.”

Mabel grabbed her face in frustration. “Gah! I can’t choose!”

“Why not buy both?” Pacifica suggested. “That’s what I always do when I can’t pick.”

“Pacifica, may I remind you again that we have a budget?” Dipper rolled his eyes.

“You don’t have to pay. I can buy one of them. Trust me, I have more money than I know what to do with.”

“Heh,  that I can believe. Thanks!” Mabel yanked Pacifica into a tight hug, making her blush. “I’m now in your debt.”

“Oh, don’t pay me back, that, like, defeats the purpose. If you really think you owe me something, it can be a favor or whatever.”

“You got it, blondie!” Mabel tossed the sweater at Dipper. “Can you two go check out? Pacifica and I are gonna go join Candy and Grenda and try on some of these clothes.”

“What? I didn’t agree to—“

“Just shut up and give them your credit card!”

Pacifica heeded Mabel’s command and let her drag her into the dressing room.

Wendy groaned as she approached the checkout line with Dipper. “Those two are so obviously into each other, it physically pains me to watch them do nothing about it.”

Dipper threw his hands up. “Ugh, I know right? I’m trying to push them together, but it’s hardly helping. I don’t understand why Mabel isn’t throwing herself at her like she would with anyone else. She’s the biggest flirt I know!”

“I get it, but it’s the same reason you’re more hesitant to flirt with a boy, kid. She’s probably scared Pacifica’s not into girls, and their friendship would get all awkward if she made a move.”

“Yeah, I guess. How do you even matchmake a matchmaker?”

“She may be a matchmaker, but you’re good with planning. You need to write shit down. Get a scheme going, ya dig?”

“Hmm...”

****

“Pacifica has been changing for a couple minutes now. Why hasn’t she come out?” Candy knocked on Pacifica’s door.

“No way! I look like I belong in a nursing home.”

Mabel laughed. “That’s the point, dum-dum! We all look like that.”

Pacifica sighed and opened the door, revealing her old-lady-fit.

“Aah! It’s adorable! Candy, selfie!”

Candy pulled out her phone and held it high above the four of them. They all posed, even Pacifica (after Mabel promised the picture wouldn’t be posted.)

Dipper and Wendy entered, holding a shopping bag. “You guys done?” Dipper handed Pacifica her credit card.

The group left the shop, wondering where to go next. Candy pointed to a Blaire’s. “Ooh! We should go to Blaire’s. I got my ears pierced there.”

Dipper shuddered. “Ugh. I hate that place. All the colors give me a headache.”

“I feel you,” Wendy spotted BeeblyBoop’s Videogames just a few doors down from Blaire’s. “Hey, Mabel, Dipper and I are gonna go to the game store. Come find us in there when you’re done.”

“Okay! Let’s go, ladies!”

Pacifica scanned the store as they walked in. “Huh. I’ve never been here.”

“What? It’s the best accessory store ever,” Grenda plucked a necklace off a shelf that read ‘BAD GURL’ and tried it on. “It knows me so well!”

“Candy, Grenda, let’s show Pacifica around this amazing place.”

After the tour for Pacifica, Mabel and Candy examined the hair section, while Pacifica and Grenda browsed the jewelery.

Pacifica prayed that Grenda wouldn’t strike up a conversation. She liked Grenda, of course, but without Mabel’s presence, she knew she’d act awkward.

But as she feared, Grenda did. “Hey, Pacifica, do you think this would be a good color on me?” She showed her a purple heart locket.

“Oh! Um, yeah. It even matches your shoes.”

Grenda looked at her purple sneakers. “Woah, you’re right! Thanks, I’m definitely buying this.”

Pacifica smiled at her and let out a breath of relief. She thought to herself:  _See? It’s not that hard. Candy and Grenda don’t secretly hate you. Probably._

Each of the girls picked out something: Pacifica a pair of hoop earrings, Mabel a pack of hair clips, Candy a phone case, and Grenda’s heart locket. After checking out, they headed over to BeeblyBoop’s Videogames, and found Dipper and Wendy with all their attention focused on the store’s playable Wii.

“It’s almost one-thirty. We should head to the food court.” Candy watched as they played _Mario Party 9_.

“One sec, just lemme beat Dipper at this minigame real quick,” Wendy mashed the ‘A’ button.

“I’m really close behind, I bet I can catch up—“

“Only ten seconds left, Dip, I bet you can’t,” Mabel teased.

The game finished with Dipper just a couple points behind Wendy; he groaned and stood up. “Okay, yeah, let’s go. I’m hungry.”

They found Stan eating a sandwich at the food court, with a Probably Faux Gold bag. “Oh, good, you’re here. Soos and Melody are over there.” He pointed to them, sat at a table across the court. “Jus’ stop by and say hi, though, they’re on a date.”

Wendy chuckled. “Wow, Stan, since when are you considerate of people’s romantic relationships?”

“Oh, shush.”

Candy tapped Mabel’s shoulder. “I’m going to go grab a spot in line.”

“Okay! Imma go talk to Soos and Melody. Anyone else wanna come?”

Grenda joined Candy in line, and the others followed Mabel to talk to the couple.

“Hey guys!” Dipper greeted.

“Oh, hey dudes! Stan said you’d come by. What’s up?”

“Just taking a fun shopping trip,” Mabel eyed their empty ice cream cups. “Ooh, what flavors did you get?”

“Scented candle,” Melody grinned. “It somehow tastes exactly what it smells like when you walk into a Bath and Body Works. And it’s delicious.”

“And I got bacon.” Soos noticed Pacifica standing awkwardly at Mabel’s side. “Oh hey, Pacifica. Haven’t seen you around.”

“Oh, yeah, I’d come by the shack more often, but I’m, like, not allowed to be there, so it’s hard to work around it.”

“Well, you’re always welcome, whenever you’re able to stop by,” Melody smiled sweetly.

“Thanks.” 

“Well, we’ve heard your suggestions, any other flavors we should consider?” Wendy asked.

“Grossly sweet chocolate bar and black coffee are their most popular ones.” Soos replied.

“Noted. Well, we’ll leave you be. See you later!” Dipper waved goodbye.

The group split off to buy the lunch of their choice, then sat at the table Stan picked out and ate together.

“Candy! Throw this fry into my mouth,” Mabel reached over the table and passed her a fry.

Dipper rolled his eyes. “Mabel, fries aren’t aerodynamic. Its shape doesn’t allow it to move well. It’ll be harder to catch.”

Pacifica, who sat next to him, elbowed his arm. “Don’t kill the fun.”

“She’s right, dude. You don’t wanna be called Captain Buzzkill again, do you?” Wendy razzed.

He simply huffed in response and watched as Mabel failed to catch the fry in her mouth.

“Again!” Grenda cheered.

Stan returned from buying his ice cream, eating out of a large cup. “Woah, you kids gotta try this. I got the black coffee flavor.”

Dipper took a bite from Stan’s cup. “Wow, I didn’t think ice cream could taste that strong.”

“I know, right?”

Mabel and Pacifica finished their food first, so they took their place in line for the ice cream.

Mabel read the menu as she stood next to her. “Hmm, do you know what flavor you want? I can’t pick between raw sugar packet and grossly sweet chocolate bar.”

“I’m considering sour candy,” Pacifica replied.

The others soon joined them in line, and they all bought their dessert. Shortly after they ate, Stan split off from them to continue his personal shopping, then the group set out again.

They browsed store to store, trying on clothes, buying the occasional accessory, picking out outfits for one another. Pacifica felt herself slowly becoming more comfortable around Candy and Grenda. It happened through small moments, like giving Candy the extra dollar she needed to purchase something or helping Grenda pick out a color that complimented her skin tone.

Eventually, everyone was malled-out and ready to go home; the twins met up with Stan, said their goodbyes to theirfriends, then headed home.

****  
  


Mabel set down the Threads for Old Men bag onto the living room table. “Hey, Stan? Where do you keep the wrapping paper?”

“Stoage room. Don’t have much, though, pretty sure most of it’s holiday-themed. Why d’you ask, anyway?”

“Isn’t it obvious? We’re gonna wrap up Ford’s clothes and gift it to him!”

“Mabel, there’s literally no special occasion, we just happened to buy something for him. We don’t need to wrap it,” Dipper turned on the TV.

“Of course we do! If you’re not gonna help, I’ll just say it’s from me only, and that you didn’t help at all. How do you think that would make our poor grunkle feel, Dipper?” She dramatized her voice.

“Ugh, fine.”

The phone rang, and Stan answered. “...Huh? Santiago? I told you I was out of the pug business... _what?_ Okay, okay, wait, one sec,” Stan lowered the phone to speak to the twins. “Wrapping paper should be in the red bin. You can find tape and other junk with the attraction supplies. This is an important call, so don’t talk to me for the next, uh, forty-five minutes.”

Dipper and Mabel made their way to the storage room and examined the wrapping paper options: penguins in sweaters, hearts with faces, and birthday balloons.

Mabel grabbed the penguin paper. “Welp, I’m sure we can agree that this is the most  Ford out of the bunch.”

“Yup, I was about to say that.”

After putting the turtlenecks into a box and wrapping it, the pair watched TV until Ford returned to the shack a little while later.

“Hey, kids, how was the mall?”

“It was great!” Mabel grabbed his hand and dragged him toward the table where the gift awaited him. “Look, we got you that thing!”

Ford took a seat. “Oh, I appreciate how you wrapped it up, despite there being no need to. It makes the gesture sweeter.”

Mabel nudged and stuck her tongue out at Dipper, who merely shot her a glare in response. “Well, you gonna open it?” He encouraged.

Ford delicately untied the ribbon around the box, then ripped open the paper and removed the box’s lid. “Oho! You got me  two? And in great choice of colors! Thank you, Dipper and Mabel.” He ruffled their hair with each hand.

“Mabel definitely deserves most of the credit. I would’ve had no idea what color to choose,” Dipper said humbly.

Ford held out the green turtleneck to his chest. “Heh, it’s alright Dipper, I’m not sure if I could’ve picked them myself. At least not the blue—I never even considered that color!”

Stan’s business call eventually ended and the Pines watched TV for the remainder of the afternoon, ate dinner, put on one of Stan’s old movies, then went to bed, thus concluding a simple but fun day.


	7. a day for old friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is the same day as the previous chapter, but focused on what ford is doing—spending time with an old friend that he may or may not be in love with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay,,, the NEXT chapter will be longer.

Ford arrived at McGucket Manor (or, as Fidds called it, McGucket’s Hootenanny Hut) and let himself in. This was no different than the usual routine.

The large doors closed with a loud thunk and a click. Ford started to head toward the study, where he and Fidds typically spent their days working.

“Stanferd? That you? I’m in the tearoom.” Fidds’ voice called out from somewhere in the mansion, his voice too distant for Ford to have any idea of its origin.

“I’m afraid I don’t know where that is, Fidds,” Ford called out, looking to the platform at the high end of the grand staircase.

“Er, right—you stay right there, I’ll find you.”

A few moments later, he found Ford standing idly in the foyer. 

Since he became stable financially and mentally, Fidds cleaned up far nicer than he had for the many years before. Today the man dressed in your standard brown old-man-type-sweater, accompanied with corduroy overalls and hiking boots. His beard was shorter, trimmed to be neater and a more convenient length, but still long, for he felt like it was an extension of his face that he just couldn’t get rid of. A plaid deerstalker hat replaced the scarecrow hat he once wore.

He gestured for Ford to follow him, and Ford complied, though confused.

Fidds led him to the tearoom. It still looked very clean and new, like it hadn’t been used much by the Northwests before they moved out. But Fidds’ use of it left signs of wear: displaced pillows on the couch and chairs, some newspapers and mail scattered across the table, candles melted on their trays to the point of almost being sludge. On the couch slept a raccoon, specifically the raccoon Fidds married during his senile days, which he later domesticated and now wandered around the house like a dog. Ford had seen this raccoon, named Sally, around the mansion a couple times before, so this didn’t faze him. The fireplace cackled, tying the whole room together with a warm and cozy aura.

Fidds gestured for the other man to sit down in the dining chair, where a hot cup of tea in fine china waited for him. “You spend a lot of time in here?”

“Heh, yeah, I’ve taken a fixin’ to tea an’ this is where I go to enjoy it. Tate comes by once a week and we like to have a cuppa tea in here an’ tell each other ‘bout what’s going on in our lives.” He took a sip from his cup.

“Ah! Tate...” Ford swallowed. “I feel... rather rude for not asking about him much. How is everything going with him?”

“Better than ever. Ev’ry so often he an’ his family spend a night or two here an’ keep me company. I really ‘preciate it. It can get lonely in this big hut,” He blew on his tea to cool it off. “But hey, least I got Sally when no one else’s here.”

Ford smiled at the other man. Despite everything Fidds went through, he was content. He forgave Ford, despite having every reason to hate him, and here they were again, working and experimenting together like they once did over thirty years ago when they were young and in love. They now shared a deep friendship that overwhelmed Ford with gratitude for what they had. “It makes me incredibly happy to hear that, Fidds,” He took a long sip from his tea. “What kind of tea is this? It’s delicious.”

“Honey oolong with a splash of oat milk. Figgered you’d like it.”

Ford drew a deep breath and breathed out a content sigh. “Well, we can stay here as long as you like, I certainly don’t mind—but is there any particular reason we’re having tea before working today?”

Fidds chuckled. “Thanks fer remindin’ me, I probably woulda forgot. I wanted to tell ya that I’m takin’ a break with my work. I’m not sure how long, but what I do know is that I’m a little tired out from all that, so I wanna take some time fer myself.”

Ford tried to supress his disappointment. “Oh, so does that mean I’m done coming over here to see you every week...?”

Fidds laughed softly. “No, silly, time fer myself means to stop workin’ and spend time with the people I care about, meaning my family, an’ you.” He placed a hand on Ford’s shoulder. “I got so caught up with my work that it was all we talked about, an’ all we did. I wanna spend actual time with you, do stuff good friends do, ‘cause you’re more than jus’ a lab partner.”

“Well, that’s a relief. I almost thought you were breaking up with me,” Ford jested after drinking the remainder of the tea in his cup and setting it down. “We should get out of this place. Perhaps we could go out for lunch?”

“Sounds great.”

****

The two decided on eating lunch at Hermanos Bros. As they ate their tacos, Ford told the other of the anomalies he’d found during his adventures with Stan. Fidds then took his turn to tell Ford about all the inventions he worked on while Ford was gone.

“We should do somethin’ else,” Fidds suggested as he sat in front of an empty plate, waiting for the check. 

“I agree. Hmm... what do the kids like to do around here? I don’t go out just to have fun often enough.”

Fidds scratched his ear. “Aint there a mini golf place ‘round here?”

“Oh! Yes, I do remember the kids telling me about that,” Ford tugged the collar of his turtleneck. “I’m not sure I’m all too good at it, though.”

“Y’know that’s not the point, Stanferd,” Fidds laughed.

The waiter stopped at their table, looked between the two men, then set the check in the middle.

“I’ll pay,” They said simultaneously.

“Please, Fidds, I’ve been helping you out with your work for free, the least I can do is buy you lunch,” Ford insisted.

“You helped me because we’re friends, silly, you don’t owe me anythin’.”

The two bickered like an old couple (in a way, they are) until Fidds finally gave in and let Ford pay.

Fidds soon realized that Ford is  awful at mini golf.

“No—Ford, yer holdin’ it wrong again.”

“Why is there a ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ way to hold it? This feels right to me.” Ford took his stance and sloppily swung at the golf ball. “In my defense, I’ve played a magical version of this in another dimension, and I was valued as a skilled player.”

“I’m not believin’ ya unless you got a trophy from there or somethin’ of the sort.” Fidds teased, watching as Ford missed the ball as he swung.

“Well, let’s see how good you are, then.”

Fidds aligned his feet, pointed his shoulders, wiggled his hips, then struck the ball. After going through all the obstacles, it stopped no more than a couple feet away from the hole. Not perfect, but certainly better than Ford.

When Ford’s turn came next, he looked to the other before hitting the ball. “What am I missing? You said you weren’t experienced with this, so how are you so much better than me?”

“Well, if you still refuse t’ hold it right, I suggest you try the hip wiggle.”

“There is no way that that makes any difference.”

Fidds shrugged. “Maybe not. But it’s worth a shot to save how badly yer losin’.”

Ford gave in and did the hip wiggle before hitting the ball, with a steadier swing this time. “Wow! You were right!”

“I honestly didn’t think that’d actually help, I just wanted t’ see you do it. But you’re improvin’!”

Ford did gradually improve, but he certainly remained bad at golf. Regardless, he enjoyed himself immensely, as did Fidds.

They decided to make one more stop before heading home: the bakery.

“Hmm, I’m thinkin’ the lemon tart. Whadda ‘bout you?” Fidds eyed the display case.

“Well, we can get a few, right? That does sound delicious, but I’m also drawn to the fudge brownie.”

“Of course! Since you bought lunch, I’m buyin’ dessert, and don’t try arguin’.”

They ate the treats like animals, then spent more time chatting.

“I really enjoyed this, Fiddleford. I suppose I should be going out more, it’s so fun!”

“Then that means next time yer family goes on a lil’ shoppin’ trip, you should join them.”

“I guess you’re right. I just never buy anything, so there doesn’t seem to be much of a purpose.”

“So? People go to the mall to browse all the time. It’s no different than you playin’ mini golf despite bein’ awful at it.”

Ford laughed, but tried to sound angry. “I’m not going out with you again if you’re just going to ridicule me.”

****

“What do you even do with McGucket, Ford? Are you like his assistant?” Dipper asked shortly after Ford opened his gift.

“More or less, yes, I helped him with his inventions. But starting today he’s actually taking a break for awhile, and we spent the day together just having fun.”

Mabel gasped in delight. “Wait, like, a date? You... and McGucket...  _are you a thing!?”_

“I—no, Mabel—we were in the past, but I don’t imagine that happening now—“ Ford stammered, as if he could somehow stop Mabel now.

Mabel let out an overly-excited (and concerningly high pitched) squeal and aggressively shook Dipper. “Dipper, we’re gonna have a third grunkle! What should we call him? Grunkle Fidds?”

Ford pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to hide his flushed cheeks. “No, Mabel, dear, you’re not getting a third grunkle—“

“Nope! Nothing you say can change my mind. It all makes sense now! You two old lovebirds want to rekindle your relationship but you’re clearly too shy to go for it! Leave it to Mabel!” She darted upstairs before Ford could say another word.

Stan, still on his phone call but was able to catch on enough to know what just happened, met eyes with Ford and snorted.

“You just got yourself in the middle of one of Mabel’s matchmaking projects. Trust me, there’s no way out of it.” Dipper said bluntly.

Ford sighed. “I can believe that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YUPPP so mabel is back with the matchmaking,,, i hadnt initially planned for fiddauthor in this fic but the fiddauthor brainrot has been extra strong lately and i wanna see these two old geezers get together. also if youre interested in fiddauthor i recommend my fic “the incompatibility of love and science” that i just recently started writing!! i have big plans for it and im really excited about it. if you’re interested just check my page and the first chapter is up :)


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